Reach

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – POETRY

problems left behind you—
ghosts with no mouths left to speak.
you walked on,
didn’t flinch.

bare your soul.
not for them.
for you.
because silence
never saved anyone.

whenever i look at the ocean,
i see a version of myself
that doesn’t need fixing.
just space.
just time.
just tide.

home—is
a sound you remember,
not a place you stand.
it’s warm light on old walls.
the echo of your name
spoken like love,
not demand.

reach for infinity.
not to conquer it,
but to know
you were never meant to fit in the lines.



This piece was written for Reena’s Xploration Challenge #374. This week, she asked us to pick a blog or more to write something. I was surprised that I hadn’t written for her challenge before. I hope I got it right. Anyway, I chose the following:

Eugenia’s Moonwashed Musings, and then I ran into her challenge, Moonwashed Weekly Prompts. I don’t participate often, but I always enjoy myself when I get over there. This week is no different. Her poem for this week struck a chord, so I scribbled a few notes. It served as the bones of this piece.

Sadje’s KeepitAlive is another blog I read regularly when I decide to keep it out of my head. In her piece “Homecoming,” her line “home is” has quiet power and hits hard. As an old soldier, I remember the importance of “home.” So, I scribbled some more, and the bones got thicker.

Melissa’s Mom With a Blog hosts these flash fiction challenges, which I enjoy. Often, I scribble pieces for them, but they are used in something else. Every now and again, I manage to finish one just for that challenge and post it. This week, I found her piece, “coming home” whose opening line pushed me over the edge. So, I started scribbling a little more. Her image inspired by the graphics for this piece. I love the feel of that image; I will probably write something for it. And we’ll see if it actually makes it out of my notebook.

I haven’t written any new poetry in quite a while. My brain seems to be churning out the longer stuff. Thanks, ladies, for helping me find my way back.

Eshe

POETRY – FREEVERSE

She was the kind of woman you never really get over.
Sure, you move on.
Build a good life, one full of blessings by any measure.
But somewhere beneath the memories—
Woven into the joy and the pain,
Tucked among the totems of a life well lived—
She’s still there.
Sitting quietly. Unmoved.

Time shifts, and I have a moment of return.
No warning, no ceremony.
Just a scent, a song, a slant of light—
And there I am again.
Back where she was.
Back where I was, too.

The first time I noticed her,
The room was buzzing with chatter and I was minding my own business.
Then she turned—head tilted,
Hair falling in that certain way—
And looked straight at me.
I held my breath.
Years later, I exhale.

Time shifts again.
The room was dark,
But dawn’s light peeked through the blinds and yawned.
I watched her eyelids flutter,
Saw the twitch at the corner of her mouth.
She was lost in a dream.
Was she dreaming of me?
Was I good enough to deserve that?

Time shifts again.
The look in her eyes when she said the words—
It told me she needed to hear them back.
But that same look told me:
If I said them,
She’d never let me take them back.

I knew she deserved better.
Knew she had the kind of soul
That life should greet with its best.
And I wasn’t it.

Time shifts back.
Things aligned and proper.
Decisions made—
Whether wrong or right,
You make them.
You live with them.
No regrets.


Still Flying

Daily writing prompt
When you were five, what did you want to be when you grew up?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

When you’re five, everything feels big.
The world, your dreams, your backpack.

But as you get older, you can’t always hold onto things without a little help.

That’s what happened when I found it—
a flash of memory caught in an old photo,
a school project that somehow survived.
Battered, scarred, but solid.
Like the dreams taped inside it.

I just wanted to fly.
I couldn’t explain why, not then.
I just did.

To see the world.
The wonders from our primers,
the postcard places that looked too perfect to be real.

Maybe I’d discover new lands,
find cool toys, read comics in French.
Were mummies scary? I needed to know.

Was riding a motorcycle as cool as it looked in the movies?
Could I jump cars like Evel Knievel?
Would I one day ride with a girl on the back,
smiling like it was the best thing ever?

I knew I wasn’t old enough for that part.
Maybe when I get big.

Would I be able to sing and dance?
Be cool like Elvis?
Tough like G.I. Joe?
Stretch like Stretch Armstrong?
Or maybe I’d just build the wild stuff I made with my Legos.

But mostly…
Mostly, I wanted to make my mom proud.

And now—
I did fly.

France, Italy, Spain, Japan—majestic in ways no book ever captured.
There’s nothing like flying over treetops with the chopper doors open.
Heart racing.
Then pounding.
Blood surging through my veins.
I felt something I still can’t describe with words.

I never jumped cars,
but I had that girl on the back.
Her arms around me,
her heartbeat against mine,
that sharp little yelp when things got wild.
Yeah, that was something.

I don’t sing, but boy, did I dance.
And when I stopped… I got fat.

Some say I was tougher than G.I. Joe.
And somehow, my influence stretched across the globe.
But no one will ever know my name.

What I remember most—
Mom’s smile as she talked about “the grands,”
each one certain they were her favorite.
Each one knowing they were loved.

As for me…
Did I make her proud?

God, I hope so.

Understanding Yourself Costs Nothing—But Changes Everything

Daily writing prompt
What’s something most people don’t understand?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

It seems like most people don’t really understand themselves—not deep down, not at the core. We’re constantly hit with ads telling us to “live our best life” or “be our best self.” Sure, there are things we’d like to change. But we rarely have the resources to make those changes. Ask anyone what they need most to improve their life, and they’ll probably say: more money. And honestly, they’re not wrong. More money could solve a lot. But it also brings its own set of problems.

What we really need is a better understanding of ourselves. That alone could make a huge difference. And guess what? It doesn’t cost a thing—except time and the willingness to take an honest look inward. Then comes the hard part: doing the actual work to change. That’s tough, especially when we’ve been conditioned to look outside ourselves for answers. Blame is our default setting—blame the system, the job, the partner, the timing.

On the flip side, some people internalize everything. I’ve done that. I’ve paid the price for it too—meds meant to manage the fallout of swallowing emotions and ignoring my own needs. But here’s the truth: just realizing that about myself has helped more than any prescription ever could.

Weekend Writing Prompt #408

PROSE – WWP #408

Her heart whispered secrets and dreams only understood by the Moon.


From Craft to Clicks: Tech’s Effect on Careers

Daily writing prompt
How has technology changed your job?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

My hands still ache, but in a different way now. My fingers still get stained—just for different reasons. I’m typing with the same number of fingers, making the same amount of mistakes.

Change has happened, but I’m starting to see the benefit.

I don’t have to press down hard to make triplekits anymore, but now the paper’s cheaper—it tears at the slightest pull. Speed replaced accuracy. People don’t bother learning the whole craft, just a piece of it. Then they turn around and make a video about how to do what they just learned, but they don’t know shit.

Now 24,000 people watched that video and walked away worse off than before. Would’ve been better if the person just said, “I don’t know—let a professional handle it.”

Shoddy work leads to crappy parts, which means more downtime, more delays. But hey, you got it in two days. That’s cool, right?

Bent but Breathing

FICTION – FFFC #313

Bent but Breathing

I’m a vagabond. A minimalist, or so I tell myself on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and every other Wednesday. Which Wednesday is it? On those Wednesdays, Mrs. Johnson from the Second Avenue Church of God in Christ leaves out the Bible study leftovers. She waits until I stumble by and grab the tray. Never smiles. Never waves. Just watches. Lately, she’s started leaving grocery bags so I can carry more. Got Ms. Pearl from the bakery to set aside day-old bread. Otis the butcher leaves scraps. Every other week, I eat like a king.

I’ve been living this way long enough to learn a few things. When you’re practically invisible, you see everything. People will walk right over you if you let them. Some look at you with pity, like helping earns them heaven points. Others can’t stand the sight of you. They try to tear you down, not realizing they’re dragging themselves lower in the process.

Then there are the few who see you. Really see you. They look you dead in the eyes and don’t flinch. Like maybe they’ve been through it too. Like they know what it takes to survive — and maybe, just maybe, what it takes to make it out the other side.

A Jewish woman, not much older than me — if at all — asked me what happened. Not in that judging way that makes you want to either run off or tell someone to kiss your ass. She asked, like she really wanted to know. The ask that says, Pull up a chair. Let’s sit. Not Let me fix you. Not Here’s a sandwich, now tell me your trauma. Just: I don’t want nothing from you. You don’t gotta clean nothing, or do no freaky shit. Just tell your truth. If you want to. Take your time. Say what you can.

I sat down, eyeing her, trying to figure her game. “I’m Ruth,” she said, and stuck out her hand. Left it there. Didn’t flinch. Didn’t speak. Just waited. So I shook it. She leaned in, like she was listening already. No pressure. No rush. It was crazy.

They sat in silence, sizing each other up — not like enemies, more like two people checking if the other is real. No threat. No fear. Just… reading the room, and each other.

Everybody wants something. Nothing’s free. That’s just how it is. Whether you’re on the street or in a boardroom, there’s always a game being played — whether or not you know it. Society teaches us that. You gotta play your role, follow the rules, if you want your piece of the pie. Do the right thing and get rewarded. Slip up, get nothing. Simple math, they say: Good people go to heaven. Bad people go to hell.

We can’t help ourselves. We were bred in an incentive-based society. You know — that carrot and stick shit. We want to do good, be better people. Lord knows we’ve seen enough misery. But somewhere along the way, it all got twisted. Long before we take our first breath, it stays twisted, and it stays that way long after we take our last breath.

I asked Ruth if she had a square. She held up a finger and walked out of the room. A few moments later, she came back and motioned toward the door. We flipped a couple of five-gallon buckets upside down and copped a squat. She handed me a square and lit one for herself. We smoked in silence. I watched her. She had that stare — the one you get when facing your demons, and they don’t blink. The kind of stare that says you’ve got something on your mind, and no one else can carry it but you.

I exhaled, and something eased up — for the first time in a long time. I looked at her, still locked in that staring match with her demons. “You are just another sister in the struggle,” I said. “Trying to stay above the churn.” She exhaled deeply and looked at me. Her gaze had softened — not by much, but enough. This is usually when you make your play. But I knew this wasn’t that kind of game. Hell, for some reason, I knew it wasn’t a game at all. I struggled to understand what was happening. She leaned back against the wall, arms folded, square resting between her fingers, waiting. So I laid it out. She’d earned it — my respect.

Top 5 Ways to Ask a Girl Out: Rule #1

FICTION – WDYS #281


Top 5 Ways to Ask a Girl Out: Rule #1
Don’t mention the creepy gnome.


I stood there, just… staring at the thing. A tiny metal gnome? Elf? Goblin? Whatever it was, it was perched on her balcony railing like it owned the place.

Did she put it there? She had to have, right? It’s not like little brass weirdos just wander onto balconies. But still—it felt like it was watching me. Judging me.

I thought about asking her, but no. That would blow up the whole operation. Can’t have her thinking I’m the kind of guy who interrogates her about lawn ornament choices. No, I’m the helpful friend. The guy offering to fix her absolute trainwreck of a car—for free. Out of kindness. Generosity. Totally not because I’m hopelessly into her and grasping at any excuse to spend time together.

God, I’m that guy. The one who offers free labor in the desperate hope of being seen as dateable. I’m one creepy figurine comment away from ruining it all. So I shut up, smile, and pretend like helping her isn’t the highlight of my entire month.

She leaned out the front door, holding two mugs. “Coffee? Or, uh… whatever this is. I might’ve forgotten how coffee works halfway through.”

“Perfect,” I said, taking one. I didn’t even like coffee, but it felt like the right thing to say. Plus, I wasn’t about to reject something she handed me with a smile that made my brain shut down like an overheating laptop.

I took a sip. It was… alarming. Bitter, burnt, and somehow both too hot and lukewarm at the same time.

“Be honest,” she said, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s… ambitious,” I offered.

She laughed. Progress.

We stood in silence for a second, both sipping this mysterious bean liquid and pretending it wasn’t a full-on sensory attack. I glanced back at the gnome. It hadn’t moved. Still smug.

“That little guy yours?” I asked, before my brain could stop my mouth.

Why? Why did I do that?

She looked over and grinned. “Oh! Yeah. Found him at a flea market. He looked like he knew secrets, you know? Like he’s seen some things.”

I nodded. “Yeah, like he knows exactly when you’re lying about liking the coffee.”

She snorted, almost spilling hers. “You’re terrible.”

Yes. Yes, I am. But also? Still here. Not banned. Not rejected. Maybe even kind of funny.

The gnome, I swear, winked at me.

Or maybe the coffee was already hitting my brain weird.

Toilet Paper and other Hard Truths

FICTION – FSS #193

He quickly climbed the trellis and reached the balcony outside of her bedroom. He watched her through her window. She was sitting on the floor, legs crossed, phone in hand, completely unaware. She always tied her hair back when she focused, and it was. Probably texting. Probably him.

Jason exhaled slowly, pressing his back against the wall just under the window. He hadn’t planned this. Not exactly. But after three days of being ignored, after seeing that one blurry photo on her story—just a hand on her thigh and a drink in the background—he couldn’t sit still.

He could hear The Cranberries playing in the background—Linger, soft and haunting. She moved to the music, not dancing exactly, but swaying in that unconscious way, like the song had tapped into something old and private inside her. Like it spoke to her soul. Like she was his private dancer and didn’t even know it.

With difficulty, he swallowed. He needed to go. He wasn’t that guy. Not the creepy ones—the ones who watched from the dark, who mistook obsession for romance. The ones who fantasized about a glance, a laugh, a shared elevator ride, and turned it into something it wasn’t.

The ones who, when they finally worked up the nerve, stood trembling and said, “Don’t you remember? You smiled at me once.” Eyes wide. Pleading. Every breath pulling them deeper into the abyss of desperation.

Jason stared at his hands. Pale knuckles, shaky grip on the cold railing.

This wasn’t who he was.
At least, he hoped not.

He jumped from the balcony, hurting his ankle but maintaining his dignity. The pain was excruciating, but it kept him honest. Every limp, every throb was a reminder: he didn’t belong up there. Not like that.

Branches whipped past as he hobbled through the trees behind her house. The cold air cut at his lungs, the wet grass soaked through his sneakers. But he kept going—because turning back would’ve been worse.

Finally, he reached the lake, where his friend Tina was waiting. She was pacing back and forth, arms crossed tight, hoodie pulled over her head. Her eyes lit up when she saw him.

“Did you do it?” she asked urgently, stepping toward him. “Well?”

He didn’t answer right away, sinking onto a bench near the water’s edge, leg outstretched, ankle swelling fast. He winced.

“I saw her,” he said, staring out at the dark water. “She was dancing.”

Tina blinked. “So… that’s a yes?”

Jason shook his head slowly. “No. I couldn’t. I’m not that guy.”

She let out a breath, relief and maybe a little disappointment mixing in her face. She sat next to him, pulling her knees up to her chest.

“Good,” she said. “Because if you were, I wouldn’t be here.”

They sat in silence for a while, the lake still, the sky just hinting at dawn.

How did I get here?
Jason stared at the rippling water like it might answer.

Where did this notion come from—the idea that if he just showed up, climbed high enough, looked long enough, maybe something would fall into place? Some moment, some clarity, some spark between them that would finally catch.

But there was no spark. Just a girl in her room, moving to music, living her life without him in it. And him, standing outside like a stranger.

He wasn’t always this guy. Was he?

Maybe it wasn’t about her at all. Maybe she was just the screen he projected it all onto.

“I think I scared myself,” he said aloud, not even sure if Tina was still listening.

She said nothing at first. Just nodded slowly.

“You weren’t trying to get her back,” she said after a while. “You were trying to find something in yourself. And you didn’t like what you saw.”

Jason closed his eyes.

That was it. That was exactly it.

Tina reached for his hand, hoping Jason would somehow see her, somehow feel her—not just her skin, but what was underneath. All the nights she answered when no one else did. All the pieces of him she held onto so he wouldn’t fall apart.

Her fingers brushed his knuckles. He didn’t pull away. But he didn’t look at her either.

Jason was still staring at the water, lost in his head, somewhere far away from this bench, this lake, from her.

She squeezed his hand gently, grounding him. Or maybe anchoring herself.

“You don’t have to chase ghosts,” she said, voice low. “You aren’t one.”

Jason finally turned to her, and for the first time that night, there was something behind his eyes. Not clarity, not yet—but something softer than the ache he’d been carrying.

He looked down at their hands, then back at her. And something between them shifted.

Tina noticed Jason was crying. Not sobbing, not breaking—but that controlled weep, the only kind allowed for men. Shoulders still. Jaw tight. Tears slipping down anyway.

He squeezed her hand tighter, but it wasn’t painful. It was grounding. Like he needed to make sure she was real.

She watched him, unsure if she should speak, unsure if words would help or just fracture the moment.

Were the tears for the girl he never really had?
Or for something else?
Something older. Deeper. Something even he hadn’t named yet.

Maybe it wasn’t about her at all. Maybe it was the weight of pretending he was okay for too long. The performance of being fine, being cool, being over it. Maybe this was the moment he stopped acting.

Tina didn’t move. She didn’t ask. She just let him feel it.

Because sometimes that’s the only way through.

Everyone knew Jason was the strong one. The steady one.
It was killing her to see him like this—silent, unraveling at the edges.

She remembered last summer. When she chucked every ounce of her self-respect out of the window for Marcus. God, Marcus. She could barely say the name without feeling her stomach turn.

Jason didn’t judge her. Didn’t say I told you so. He just sat next to her on the curb, handed her a Gatorade, and said, “You’ve got nothing to prove. Not to anyone.”

And then:
“I promise I’ll see you through to the other side. We can cry, get drunk, get high, and cry again—if that’s what you need.”

At the time, she thought he was just trying to make her feel better. Talking big, saying what friends say when they don’t know what else to do.

But he meant it.

The bastard was right there, holding her hair back as she worshipped the porcelain god, talking her through it like she was in labor. He had an endless supply of toilet paper, too—which, in hindsight, was no small thing. Because let’s be real: when a real crying fit hits, tissues don’t cut it. Toilet paper is the only thing that makes sense. There’s a lot, and it’s everywhere.

And now here he was. Finally cracked open.

And it was her turn.

“Why are you here, Tina?” Jason asked, voice rough. “Pity? Some sense of duty? Or something else?”

She didn’t flinch, but it stung. Not the words—she’d heard worse—but the fact that he said them. That he really didn’t know.

Tina leaned back, looked up at the night sky like it might help her find the right words. It didn’t.

“You think I came out here in the middle of the night, to a freezing-ass lake, because I pity you?” she said finally. “Come on, Jason. Give me more credit than that.”

He looked away, jaw tight.

“I’m here,” she said, softer now, “because I don’t like who you become when you think no one’s watching. Because I’ve seen you hold everyone else together for so long that I forgot you might fall apart, too.”

She paused.

“And maybe… yeah. Maybe because part of me was waiting for you to need me for once.”

The silence that followed wasn’t awkward. It was heavy. Honest.

Jason didn’t respond right away. But this time, when he looked at her, he really looked.

“There’s never been a time I didn’t need you,” he said, eyes low. “But I don’t think I knew that until right now.”

He ran a hand through his hair, exhaled like he’d been holding it for years.

“So I acted like a jackass.”

Tina didn’t speak right away. She just let it hang there, let him sit in it.

Then she smirked, just a little. “Yeah. You did.”

Jason gave a short, almost-laugh. “Thanks for the grace.”

She nudged his shoulder. “You’re welcome.”

And just like that, the cold didn’t feel so cold.
The silence didn’t feel so loud.
And maybe—for the first time in a long time—Jason felt like he wasn’t holding the weight alone.

Quo Vadis

Rarely have I collaborated with other poets. This was the first one I actually enjoyed working on.

An Andy Scott/Mangus Khan Collaboration

It was not suppose to be like this
when we took our cries to the streets
it was suppose to start a revelation for us all
where we would give freedom’s wall a kiss
living past the years of defeats
lifting the smothering shawl

I close my eyes to the truth
Mesmerized by freedom’s illusion
I close my eyes to the smoke
From smoldering cinders of liberty

I begin to choke …

Begin to choke …

Crying out, for my fears are becoming true
Denial, such a lovely color for you
Crying out, for my guilt is bleeding through
As the lies just sit and glare at you

How deep I don’t want to know…

I feel the knife of greed scrape to my bone
Grinding past where there is no more blood to bleed
All of the meat is gone from underneath my skin

Scream from my dried, chapped lips

“How much more to be taken?”
“There is nothing more to be taken!”

On my knees with defeated independence
a withered, empty body
with belief of tomorrow that will not escape
until, step by step, the embers rise again

My Master’s grace I beckon …

As I shudder, for I feel its warmth growing
I feel it creeping through every fiber of my being
Help me understand! What is this?
This is not the way I want to live!

Help me withstand this … Would you please?
Give me the strength to stomp out Hatred’s fiery desires
Give me the strength to stop this, before it
seduces my soul and engulfs my heart

Help me to stand with the courage of my beliefs
May I have the wisdom to have the understanding,
that the tomorrow I seek …Begins with me

The Joy of Losing Yourself in Writing and Art

Daily writing prompt
What activities do you lose yourself in?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

The last time I answered this prompt, I think I went with something obnoxiously grand like “A Good Story.” I should be shot for sounding so pretentious. But I wasn’t lying—just leaving out the messier bits of the truth.

When I’m in creation mode, the real world ceases to exist. I don’t hear, see, or care about anything other than the story I’m writing or the drawing I’m working on. It’s like my brain switches dimensions, and all outside stimuli become irrelevant. This used to drive my late wife insane. She’d be talking, calling my name, possibly setting the house on fire, and I’d be sitting there, oblivious, lost in whatever imaginary world had taken hold of me. I’d come back to reality only to find her standing there, arms crossed, staring daggers into my soul. And honestly? Fair. It’s a miracle I survived as long as I did.

Writers have been called time travelers, and I think that’s dead-on. But it makes me wonder—when we write, are we building new worlds or excavating old memories? Because when I write, the worlds feel real. I don’t mean in an “I have a well-thought-out setting with consistent internal logic” way. No, I mean in an I can hear the wind howling through the trees, smell the rain-soaked earth, and feel the blood on my hands kind of way. It’s a full-blown sensory experience. I write down everything I see, hear, and feel, but don’t ask me to explain where it all comes from because I genuinely have no clue.

And then there’s the time warp. I sit down to write, and suddenly, five hours have passed. Meals have been skipped. Hydration? Forgotten. Responsibilities? Who’s she? But in exchange for this self-imposed neglect, I get The Surge. The best way I’ve ever found to describe it comes from the movie Highlander. I call it The Quickening. It’s this electric, all-consuming rush—pure creative adrenaline surging through every nerve in my body. I’d say it’s better than drugs, but let’s be real, I wouldn’t know. It’s definitely better than caffeine, though. And I say that as someone whose blood type is probably espresso.

Drawing, however, is a completely different beast. I still lose track of time, but the sensation isn’t electric—it’s tranquil. A deep, bone-melting calm settles over me. My heartbeat slows, my breathing evens out, and for those few hours, the chaos of existence takes a backseat. If writing is an untamed storm, then drawing is a slow, meditative drift down a lazy river. It’s the only thing that relaxes me more than pretending I don’t have responsibilities.

So yeah, I love getting lost in a good story. But really, I just love getting lost. Period. Maybe that’s why I do what I do—because the real world is often too loud, too dull, or just too much. And if I’m going to vanish into another reality, it might as well be one of my own making.

Reflections on Society: The Weight of Words and Actions

PROSE – RANDOM THOUGHTS

In 1988, Chuck D hit us with this unforgettable line: “I got a letter from the government.” That line has lived rent-free in my head ever since, resurfacing when I least expect it—usually when I need it most. Those moments when I need a reminder of the mess we’re in.

I think it stuck with me because of its quiet punch. Public Enemy was known for sonically assaulting your eardrums and shaking your soul, but the opening of “Black Steel in the Hour of Chaos” starts like a casual conversation, just a couple of guys rapping about something that was on everyone’s mind.

“Man, can you believe this shit?”

Every time I got a letter from the government, that same question echoed in my head. It wasn’t some tinfoil-hat paranoia—it was my job. I was the source of that dread and anxiety. I was the one delivering news people didn’t want to hear, the harbinger of bureaucracy, the bearer of all things stamped, sealed, and official.

And you know what? That shit weighs on you.

Driving to an appointment one day, I saw someone I consider a member of “The Homeless”—and yes, I call homelessness a government-sanctioned movement because the fact that we even have a homelessness problem in this country is absurd. We act like it’s some unavoidable force of nature, like hurricanes or earthquakes, instead of a system we built and continue to uphold. We hold charity galas where rich people sip champagne and bid on paintings to “raise awareness,” while outside, a guy is digging through a trash can for half a sandwich. Cities spend millions not on housing solutions but on hostile architecture—park benches with dividers so no one can lie down and spikes under bridges to keep people from taking shelter. We pretend to care just enough to feel good about ourselves, but not enough to actually fix anything.

Some people have sacrificed everything to make this country function, and yet, this is the best we can offer them?

“Is this shit… the best?”

Really? This is it? The pinnacle of civilization? Get the fuck outta here!

But then I saw her. A woman draped in a mink blanket, rocking a floppy hat, standing on the corner like she owned the world. The traffic light changed as I drove past her, and she didn’t flinch. She was unbothered. Cool as she wanted to be. It was almost poetic.

I muttered to myself, “Yes.”


“You’re quite hostile.”

“I got a right to be hostile. My people are persecuted.”

Public Enemy said it best.

For me, “My people” has never been about race, color, or creed. It extends to everyone, no matter how they see me. We like to pat ourselves on the back for how “connected” we are, how much “progress” we’ve made, but let’s be real—we are more divided than ever. Dignity, honor, and respect? Those are punchlines now. If you’re lucky, someone will just forget them entirely instead of twisting them into a joke at your expense.

And “persecuted” doesn’t always come with fire and brimstone. Sometimes, it’s death by a thousand inconveniences. It’s getting pulled over for a busted taillight and knowing you’re about to make some cop’s day more exciting than it needs to be. Seeing corporations celebrate diversity initiatives while their leadership remains overwhelmingly homogenous is infuriating. It’s working twice as hard for half as much, and if you dare complain, you’re labeled “difficult.”

People lie to the very ones they claim to love. We open ourselves and share something close to us; we let them see us, only to be judged, only for them to rip our hearts out, show them to us, and then crush them just to make sure we know who did it and why. And then, just to rub salt in the wound, we’re told we have to be strong. We have to rise above. Sure. No problem. Let me just pop on my superhero cape and pretend I didn’t see that betrayal coming from a mile away.

But what really gets me, what keeps me up at night, is the way some people pick on the weak like it’s a sport. The sheer audacity of it, the cruelty, the absolute bullshit of it all.

Why can’t we just let people be who they are? Love them as they are? No adjustments required.

A movement preaches this very thing, and while it’s well-intended, undoing a hundred years of supreme malarkey is no small task. I admit that I used to be one of those people who judged unfairly. I can’t undo my past, but I can control who I choose to be moving forward. And that, at least, feels like something.


How cool would it be if we could bob in and out of time, cruising in a pink Cadillac with plush velvet seats, Robert Plant belting out the opening verse to “Heartbreaker”? Traveling back to the moment before we became assholes, before bitterness took root. Imagine if we could just press eject and launch all that baggage out the window like a bad mixtape.

But it doesn’t work that way.

Nothing lasts forever. Not even earth and sky.

Random Fiction – 03062025

FICTION – CHALLENGE RESPONSES

Welcome to the world of Disbelief and Distrust—

Worlds where conflict eclipses triumph, where chaos consumes order, and where the seeds of doubt and treachery grow into forests of despair. But these realms were not always so. In the earliest days, when existence was still young and malleable, Disbelief and Distrust were mere flickers in the minds of creation’s first inhabitants.

Some say these forces were the unintended consequences of free will—a byproduct of curiosity and skepticism, given form and power through the thoughts of mortals. Others believe they were forged by celestial beings, birthed as cosmic safeguards to ensure that no single truth could dominate reality unchallenged. Whether accident or design, they grew unchecked, feeding on the uncertainties of gods and men alike.

Disbelief first manifested as a whisper—a single voice among the masses who dared question the unquestionable, challenge the sacred, and pull at the strings of fate. Basically, the original troublemaker who looked at the divine rulebook and said, ‘Yeah, but what if we didn’t?’ With each doubter, its presence strengthened, evolving from a mere notion into a force capable of unmaking destiny itself.

Distrust, its counterpart, festered in the spaces between souls, spreading like a silent toxin. It began as a quiet unease between rulers and their subjects, between lovers, and between allies on the battlefield. In time, it became an entity all its own, feeding off betrayal and paranoia, unraveling the very fabric of unity.

Together, these forces did not simply exist—they consumed, reshaped, and twisted the world until belief became fragile and alliances mere illusions. And so, the war began, not with swords or spells, but with doubt and deception, forces far more insidious than any weapon forged by mortal hands. Disbelief, a venomous force that poisons the soul, breeds Havoc and Turmoil, twisting reality into something grotesque and unrecognizable—like a bad haircut you were too confident about until you saw your reflection. It has existed in many forms, but each version of it is darker than the last, evolving with the fears and doubts of mankind. It was not always so—Disbelief was once a mere whisper, a subtle question in the hearts of mortals. But as time passed and the hearts of men grew uncertain, Disbelief found its roots deep within their souls, growing stronger with every doubt, every fear, every betrayal.

The origins of Disbelief can be traced back to the early days of creation, when mortals were still bound to the will of the gods—because, apparently, even celestial beings like to micromanage. In those days, the gods bestowed their gifts upon mankind, guiding them with divine wisdom. But as civilizations flourished, so too did pride and skepticism. Some began to question the gods’ intentions, wondering if their fates were truly dictated by celestial hands or if they had been deceived. This questioning fractured the foundation of faith, and from the cracks, Disbelief was born.

A nameless entity at first, Disbelief took shape in the minds of those who no longer saw the gods as their benefactors but as distant and uncaring overlords. It whispered to kings and scholars, to soldiers and poets, planting the seeds of doubt that would one day bloom into chaos. The first great war between mortals and the divine was not fought with swords but with defiance, as if the gods themselves had crafted the world from brittle tin, waiting for it to collapse under the weight of human uncertainty. As temples were abandoned and prayers went unanswered, Disbelief swelled in power, taking on a consciousness of its own.

As the gods watched their influence wane, some chose to leave, retreating beyond the veil of mortal comprehension, while others attempted to reclaim their dominion through force. But it was too late. Disbelief had become more than an idea—it was a force, a presence that fed on uncertainty, growing stronger with every soul that wavered, spreading like a blight across the minds of those who once held faith. When the gods fled the Earth during the distorted Age of Iron, Disbelief was free to roam unchecked, a shadow in every mind, a voice in every heart.

Now, Disbelief is no longer just a thought—it is an entity, a being that drifts unseen, whispering into the ears of rulers, warriors, and scholars alike—kind of like an overenthusiastic life coach, except instead of motivation, it peddles existential dread. It’s the mental equivalent of a mouse loose in your house—small, sneaky, and impossible to get rid of, no matter how many traps you set. It is a realm unto itself, a vast expanse where reality bends and truth is an illusion. Those who enter it rarely return, for within its depths, all certainty dissolves.

When combined with Distrust, the effect is catastrophic. The tension becomes unbearable, the mind a battlefield where shadows whisper lies, and truth is a fleeting ghost. Together, these forces break the spirit of Ian more thoroughly than the might of the ancient gods—gods who once claimed dominion over the will of mankind but who fled Earth during the distorted Age of Iron. An age when the world was stained with sin, riddled with betrayal, and reeking of dishonor.

When these two realms collide, a force unlike any other emerges—an all-encompassing dominance that suffocates even the strongest of beings. No matter how resilient and how indomitable one believes themselves to be, they are bound to fall, shackled by the unseen chains of paranoia and despair. This force, if harnessed, can become a weapon—a blade forged in suffering, wielded by those who thrive in chaos. In the hands of a master of mayhem, the devastation is boundless. The earth itself weeps beneath the carnage, rivers turning crimson with the blood of the fallen. The bodies of men and women, once vibrant, now lifeless, litter the ground, silent witnesses to the horror. A wrath unchallenged, its echoes rippling through time, distorting the lives of its many victims, unweaving their very essence until nothing remains but fragmented ghosts of who they once were.

Altered logic usurps rational thought, warping perception until truth and illusion intertwine. The world becomes an ever-shifting labyrinth where deception reigns supreme. The veil of reality is lifted, revealing visions conjured by unseen forces, images that flicker and shift like a mirage on a sun-scorched wasteland. What wicked hand has beckoned forth such a power? What dark scheme has set this storm of deception into motion? Could it be the cunning of Lucifer himself, resurrecting an age-old dominion?

If there is to be salvation, it lies in opposition. The forces of belief and trust, the antithesis of destruction, must rise to meet this encroaching void. These forces stand as mirror images to the realms of disorder, the counterbalance in an eternal war. The battle between these realms rages on, an endless clash of light and dark. Legends tell of past wars where champions of both forces rose and fell. The Celestial Reckoning, a war that shook the heavens and earth alike, saw the rise of the Radiant King, a true crackajack of battle and wisdom, whose unwavering belief in truth and order nearly sealed the fate of chaos forever. But from the abyss emerged the Harbinger of Doubt, a being forged from the very essence of Disbelief, who shattered the golden citadel and plunged the realms into turmoil once more.

The Forgotten War, fought in the silence between ages, saw the rise of the Forsaken Legion—warriors who once served the gods but fell victim to Distrust, which, honestly, is what happens when divine beings start playing favorites and forget that mortals have an attention span shorter than a goldfish on caffeine. It’s the celestial equivalent of giving a starving cat a single bite of food and then wondering why it won’t leave you alone. Their betrayal unleashed a darkness so profound that even the gods themselves hesitated to intervene, leaving mortals to fend for themselves in a world consumed by uncertainty.

Each battle carves deeper wounds into existence, proving time and again that neither side will ever truly claim victory. The war is eternal, and those who dare enter its fray find themselves lost to history, their names spoken only in whispers, their fates written in the blood-soaked annals of time. Some claim that good will always triumphs and that righteousness will endure. But to underestimate the power of chaos is to invite ruin.

For within the darkness lies a weapon beyond mortal comprehension. It remains dormant, a thing of insignificance, until one dares master it. Only those with unwavering conviction, boundless skill, and a deep-seated belief in its power can unlock its full potential. This belief is paramount, for without it, the very fabric of existence unravels. Reality would fragment, leaving us stranded in isolated worlds of our own making—prisons of the mind, where despair festers and hope withers.

The journey does not end here, for all paths eventually lead to the inevitable—

The Land of the Dead.

Or as some like to call it, ‘the afterlife’s waiting room,’ complete with an unsettling lack of background music and a never-ending queue.

Or as some like to call it, ‘the afterlife’s waiting room,’ where even the dead can’t escape bureaucracy.

The air grows heavy, thick with the scent of decay and the whispers of forgotten souls. The light dims, not into darkness but into an eerie, shifting twilight where shadows move with minds of their own. Each step forward feels like sinking into an unseen abyss, the very ground beneath shifting and unstable, as though reality itself is reluctant to let go. A deep chill seeps into the marrow of your bones, and an unsettling pressure coils around your chest as if unseen hands are testing your resolve.

A wind, carrying the echoes of wailing voices, howls through the void, neither warm nor cold but filled with an otherworldly weight. The transition is not abrupt but agonizingly slow, stretching time until past and present blur. The veil between worlds is thin here, and every sensation—every breath, every heartbeat—feels distant, detached, as though you are already half a ghost. And then, with a final step, you arrive. The land before you is neither fully alive nor fully dead, a liminal space where the lost linger, awaiting judgment or oblivion.

The Land of the Dead.

But before we reach its chilling gates, we pass through a place suspended in uncertainty, a world known to some as the Realm of Indecision, to others as the Land of Neutrality. Here, all must wander at some point in their existence. For indecision is a plague of the soul, a force that binds even the strongest hearts in shackles of hesitation. It thrives on the turmoil of man, growing stronger with each faltering step.

Your only true ally in this place is the resilience of your mind. If one’s thoughts twist and turn, they will be twisted in return. For the body is but a shell, its sole purpose to house the immortal soul. When its task is complete, the soul departs, moving toward a final reckoning. Only in completion does it find peace, shielded from the reach of mortals. For each soul has a mission, a destiny known only to itself.

As we tread further, the Land of the Dead reveals itself in all its haunting splendor. The inhabitants of this forsaken world drift like wraiths, their faces twisted in expressions of bewilderment and dread. Each soul lingers, uncertain of where their journey will take them next. Have they fulfilled their purpose? Or are they doomed to walk the path leading to eternal suffering?

There is yet another fate—one feared above all others. Some try to defy the inevitable, to twist fate itself, but they cannot escape the weight of their own existence. The judgment of the soul is final. If Lucifer is outwitted, freedom is granted. But if one falters, if darkness prevails, then the fate is clear—the soul is cast into the fiery abyss of Chaotic Evil, which is essentially Hell’s VIP section, but with worse music and a strict no-refunds policy.

Hell.

And so, the cycle continues.

The world you once knew fades into obscurity, replaced by something else entirely—a new realm, where the inhabitants bear a different curse. This world is inhabited by those who have chosen their fate. They followed the Path of Suicide, forsaking life, fleeing pain in the only way they knew. But their suffering did not end—it merely changed form.

The story does not end here. It never truly ends.

For the war between belief and disbelief, trust and betrayal, light and chaos is eternal. But there is a prophecy whispered among the remnants of faith, etched in the forgotten tongues of those who saw beyond the veil of chaos. It speaks of a final reckoning, a moment when the balance will be tipped for the last time.

Legends tell of a wanderer, neither fully bound to the realm of trust nor entirely lost to the abyss of doubt. This wanderer, marked by both worlds, holds the key to the war’s conclusion. Some say they will be the one to weave belief and disbelief into something new, something beyond the cycle of destruction. Others fear they will be the catalyst that plunges existence into an inescapable darkness.

And as the battle rages on, the forces of both sides seek this figure, eager to shape the prophecy to their will—before the prophecy shapes them.

And you are now a part of it.


Ah, the best-laid plans of mice, men, and procrastinating creatives. There I was, determined to take a “break” from my earth-shattering projects—you know, the ones that will undoubtedly revolutionize the art world and literature as we know it. I dramatically set aside my drawing pencils (because apparently, I’m too good for a simple #2) and closed my idea notebook with a satisfying thud. Today was going to be different. Today, I would be a normal human being and mindlessly scroll through WordPress like everyone else.

But the universe, in its infinite wisdom, had other plans. Not even a full morning had passed before I glanced down to find my notebook splayed open like an attention-seeking drama queen. Lo and behold, it was littered with hastily scribbled notes that had apparently manifested themselves through sheer force of creative genius. Or, you know, my subconscious refusing to take a day off. Thanks, brain.

“Well,” I sighed dramatically to my empty room (because talking to yourself is the first sign of genius or insanity—I’m banking on the former), “let’s make something up.” And that’s when it happened. Guppy, my feline overlord, executed a move so graceful it would make Simone Biles weep with envy. In one fluid motion, she raised her paw skyward, a look of utter bewilderment gracing her furry visage as her eyes darted to her treat bowl. It was as if she was auditioning for the floor exercise in some bizarre alternate universe where cats compete in gymnastics.

Naturally, this led me to ponder: Do domestic pets have their own Olympics? Picture it: Labradoodles doing synchronized swimming, hamsters on the balance beam, and goldfish competing in the 100-meter butterfly (pun absolutely intended). The opening ceremony alone would be worth the price of admission—assuming you could get all the animals to march in an orderly fashion without starting an inter-species war.

As I contemplated this groundbreaking concept, Guppy maintained her pose, no doubt wondering why her human was lost in thought instead of filling her bowl with the gourmet delicacies she so richly deserves. And there I was, once again, with pen in hand, jotting down ideas for yet another project that would surely change the world—or at least provide a solid 15 minutes of entertainment on social media.

So much for taking a break; at this rate, I’ll need a vacation from my vacation. Oh, wait, I’m retired. Maybe next time I’ll try locking my notebook in a safe and throwing away the key. Though knowing my luck, I’d probably end up writing the next great American novel on Post-it notes stuck to my forehead.

Whew! Where did that rant come from?

Thanks to the following challenges:

Ragtag Daily Prompt

Fandango’s FOWC

Linda Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday

Random Fiction – 02212025

FICTION

When you’re young, you wander through life with a carefree attitude, convinced that nothing tragic will ever befall you. It’s not that you think you’re made of steel; it’s just that misfortune always seems to strike elsewhere, affecting other people. You know these people—your classmates who sit a few rows ahead in math, friends who share secrets during recess, rivals who challenge you in sports, and those vaguely familiar faces passing in the school hallway whose names always escape you. “Who is that?” You recognize them; they might live across the street or next door, but their names never stick. You catch wind of their troubles in hushed conversations over cafeteria trays or notice the signs—a bruise blooming under an eye or a sudden empty desk where someone used to sit. But you? You’re shielded by an invisible armor. Untouchable. Until one day, that armor cracks, and the reality that you’re just as vulnerable as everyone else comes crashing down.

As a guy growing up, you were conditioned to believe the worst thing you could be called was a wimp or a pussy. Those words stung like a slap to the face. But the worst of all was “pansy.” It technically meant the same thing, yet it carried a unique venom, like an elite-tier insult that could ignite a brawl. They were fighting words, as the old-timers would say. I often imagined a secret list of such words that, when uttered, left you with no choice but to unleash the rage pent up inside the beast within us all, a primal code of manhood handed down through the ages by our Neanderthal ancestors. The rationale behind it was nonexistent—nonsensical, absurd, or downright foolish didn’t even begin to cover it. I even went so far as to ask friends and acquaintances, hoping to uncover this mythical list’s existence, but they just gave me strange looks as if I was the odd one out. “Weirdo.” There’s another term I’m certain once ranked high on that clandestine list.

If there was one thing certain to amplify male foolishness, it was the presence of a girl. You might assume it would be the confident ones with a smooth stride and an easy grin. But you’d be mistaken. It was simply the presence of any female. Something about her steady, evaluating gaze seemed to flick a switch in our lizard brains. Suddenly, we were all posturing like peacocks, vying for attention as if auditioning for the role of “Alpha Male #2” in a poorly scripted high school drama.

“Cut…cut, cut, cut…” the director’s voice echoed through the set, slicing through our bravado. He rose from his worn director’s chair with an exasperated sigh, his footsteps heavy as he approached. He muttered incoherently, his brows furrowing in frustration. Turning abruptly, he addressed a bewildered production assistant who appeared as if they had stumbled onto the wrong set altogether. “It’s missing… I don’t know,” he said, rubbing his temple as if the motion might conjure clarity from the chaos in his mind. The PA shrugged, their confusion mirroring his own.

“More, you know? More,” he declared, fixing his gaze on you with an intensity that suggested the simple word held the universe’s mysteries. It might, who knows? Because at that moment, you felt the weight of impending humiliation hanging over you like a storm cloud, threatening to unleash if you failed to decipher this cryptic instruction. So you reset, ready to reenact the scene with exaggerated bravado and clumsy confidence. A muscular guy, his shirt straining against bulging biceps, lunged forward to take a swing at a smaller guy. The smaller one stood his ground, fists clenched and eyes steely—not because he had faith in his victory, but because maintaining dignity in defeat was preferable to being labeled a pansy. Who needs self-preservation when fragile masculinity whispers its deceitful promises of status and respect in your ear?

The worst beating I ever took wasn’t even for something I did. And that, frankly, was offensive. I was the kind of kid who had done plenty to earn a few ass-kickings, but this one? This was charity work.

Susan Randle—radiant in a way that made heads turn in every hallway—sat beside me in the darkened movie theater. During what she half-jokingly called our “date” (really just two people sharing a row while an action film played), she eyed me with a mischievous smirk and accused me of being gay simply because I hesitated when she leaned over, voice low and daring, to ask if I wanted to “do it.” The dim light flickering over her face caught the earnest sparkle in her eyes before she suddenly closed the distance and pressed her lips against mine. In that charged moment, the unwritten, yet unanimously understood rule against “unsanctioned sugar”—the secret code dictating who could kiss whom—reared its head. No one ever seemed to grant an exception, whether you were a girl or a guy. And here I was, trapped between the dreaded labels: on one end lay the desperate horndog willing to prove his manhood at every twist, and on the other, the discredited possibility of being gay. I wasn’t interested in becoming just another name on her ever-growing list or dealing with the fallout of shattering her carefully constructed illusion of desirability. When a boy disrupted that illusion, the consequences were swift and ruthless.

That catalog wasn’t a myth—it was as real as the whispered rankings that circulated among us. It wasn’t enough to simply admire the “right” girl; if you dared to look away or, heaven forbid, question the unspoken challenges, your name was scrawled in the ledger of sins. Failed to laugh at the jokes delivered with just the right touch of irony, dress in conforming denim and sneakers, or walk with that practiced swagger? Sure enough, it was marked on the list.

My reluctance to follow these unwritten rules quickly made me a target. Over the following weeks, a series of meticulously scheduled beatings forced me to confront the cruel reality of teenage hierarchies. After school, I would find myself cornered in the deserted back lot behind the gym, where a group of boys awaited with grim determination. They’d shout derogatory names—“fairy boy” and a particular favorite, “pirate,” a crude truncation of “butt pirate”—words spat out with the casual cruelty of a rehearsed routine. Each blow landed with precision, and amid the sting and shock, I discovered a perverse sort of order; they made sure I wasn’t crippled for good. I clutched my prized 96 mph fastball as if it were a lifeline and leaned into my natural left-handed stance, determined to keep my place on the team even if I was labeled a “fairy boy” behind closed doors.

By the time the school year drew to a close, the beatings ceased as if a final judgment had been passed in some bizarre, secret rite of passage. One by one, the bullies patted me on the back with a mixture of grudging admiration and hollow platitudes, congratulating me on having “taken it like a man.” It was as if surviving their collective assault were the final exam in a twisted curriculum of manhood. They’d shrug and say, “It wasn’t personal. It was just something that needed doing.” To them, such senseless violence was nothing short of an honorable tradition—a sacred duty executed without a shred of genuine empathy.

That summer, I found brief refuge away from the tyranny of high school corridors with my father in Northern California. He was a truck driver, his bronzed, weathered hands as familiar with the hum of diesel engines as he was with the hard lines of a life lived outdoors, where emotions were as heavy as the cargo he hauled. My parents’ origins were a collage of chance encounters: they’d originally met at a sultry George Benson concert in the Midwest, where the guitar licks sultry under a neon haze had paved the way for something unexpected. Within nine months of that chance meeting, I came into the picture—a living reminder of their brief yet potent infatuation. They had the wisdom to avoid the charade of forced domesticity; soon after, my mom returned east while my dad continued chasing horizons out west. Mysterious fragments of half-truths and secrets that always belong to a larger narrative are as American as elitism and Chevrolets and need no full explanation.


I used the prompts listed below in this bit of flash fiction

RDP – beast

Fandango – FWOC – Date

Weekend Writing Prompt #403

Here is my response to the Weekend Writing Prompt



The Theory of Everything eluded him, dancing just beyond his grasp like starlight through fog. In his cluttered office, equations sprawled across chalkboards, each variable a stepping stone toward universal truth. Years of research had led to this moment, yet certainty remained a stranger. Coffee grew cold beside scattered papers, forgotten in the pursuit of understanding. Perhaps, he thought, watching dust motes spiral in the afternoon light, the beauty lay not in finding the answer but in the endless quest itself.

Weekend Writing Prompt #402

Here is my response to the Weekend Writing Prompt



The old swing creaked in the autumn wind, a spook of childhood laughter echoing through the empty yard. Shadows stretched long, whispering secrets only the moon could understand. The house remembered everything.

Random Fiction – 02112025

FICTION – START OF SOMETHING

“You can never trust the things you hear. Blowhards running around spreading rumors like it’s the national pastime – right up there with baseball and avoiding jury duty,” grunted Detective Maclan as he wrestled with an ancient copper kettle that had seen better days, probably during the Roosevelt administration. The first one.

Mac had the droopy eyes of a basset hound that had just been told Christmas was canceled, minus any of the charm that might make you want to pat his head and give him a biscuit. His face was a topographical map of poor life choices, sour mash, and too many late nights chasing leads that went nowhere.

He was from one of those big cities that think they’re God’s gift to civilization – Detroit, New York, Chicago, take your pick, I could never remember which one. You know the type: concrete jungles where dreams are made of, according to the tourism boards, and people who’ve never had to parallel park there in winter. The kind of places that plaster themselves across postcards nobody sends anymore, where the locals wear their area code like a badge of honor and treat their pizza preferences like a religion.

I’d been wondering, if these metropolitan wonderlands were such paradise on Earth, why Mac had spent the last two decades in our little corner of nowhere, where the most exciting thing to happen was that time someone stole the mayor’s garden gnome. Turned out it was the mayor’s wife, but that’s another story.

At least Mac had decent taste in music – Glenn Miller and Count Basie crooned from a dusty record player in the corner. The big band tunes almost made up for his personality, which had all the warmth of a February morning in Minnesota. Almost.


Prompts Used:

Fandango’s FOWC – Kettle

Ragtag Daily Prompt – Rumor

Daily Doodle – 02042025

ART – PENCIL SKETCH – RANT

In my usual digital existence, I conjure AI-birthed masterpieces from the depths of my imagination, letting algorithms do the heavy lifting while I play puppet master of pixels. But the other day, something snapped in my perfectly curated technological sanctuary. After weeks of wrestling with an inexplicable urge – like a cat trying to resist knocking things off a table – I finally surrendered to my baser artistic instincts.

In a fit of creative madness, I dismantled my pristine computer lab, a temple of processing power and blinking lights, transforming it into something almost prehistoric: an actual art studio. The horror. I excavated long-buried art supplies like an archaeologist unearthing artifacts from a civilization that knew how to function without Wi-Fi. The sketch pad emerged from its tomb, probably wondering what year it was, while dried-up markers and dusty pencils rolled around like confused time travelers.

My reluctance to embrace traditional art wasn’t unfounded – my last serious artistic endeavor predated the invention of social media. Since then, my artistic expressions had been limited to absent-minded scribbles during those endless phone calls with customer service, where “your call is important to us” plays on a loop that would make Dante reconsider the circles of Hell. These masterpieces typically featured abstract demons and nameless entities that looked like they’d been rejected from a budget horror movie’s creature department.

Yet here I stood, analog tools in hand, facing the blank white void of possibility – or possibly just facing the void of my artistic abilities. The paper stared back, judging me with its pristine emptiness, daring me to make my mark. It knew, as did I, that this could either be the renaissance of my artistic journey or just another reason why I should stick to pressing buttons and letting AI do the heavy lifting.



I’m discovering that artistic atrophy is real – like trying to do splits after decades of couch-surfing real. The muscle memory in my fingers has apparently retired to a beach somewhere, sipping cocktails and laughing at my current predicament. I’d conveniently forgotten about the sheer labor involved in sketching, the way it demands patience that my Twitter-trained attention span no longer possesses.

Here I am, yanking out what precious few strands remain on my increasingly reflective dome, while my fingers are stained with pretentious charcoal imported from some artisanal mine in the depths of European forests. Because apparently, American charcoal is too pedestrian, too lacking in that je ne sais quoi that only comes from being excavated by third-generation charcoal artisans who whisper sweet nothings to each piece before packaging. Meanwhile, the humble No. 2 pencil, that faithful companion that birthed countless doodles and masterpieces alike, now sits in the corner like a neglected relic, deemed too barbaric for my evolved artistic sensibilities.

The absurdity isn’t lost on me as I sit here, surrounded by tools that cost more than my first car, trying to remember how I ever managed to create anything with those basic supplies in my youth. It’s like watching a master chef refuse to cook without their imported Japanese knife collection, completely forgetting they first learned to slice vegetables with a butter knife in their mother’s kitchen.

We’re masters at this kind of self-deception, aren’t we? Convincing ourselves that we need the finest tools, the most expensive equipment, the most exotic supplies to create something worthwhile. Meanwhile, our younger selves were out there making magic with crayons and notebook paper, blissfully unaware that their tools were “inferior.” They were too busy having fun, too engrossed in the pure joy of creation to worry about the pedigree of their materials.

Sure, as we develop our craft, better tools can enhance our capabilities – like upgrading from a tricycle to a mountain bike. But somewhere along the way, we’ve started believing that the tools make the artist, rather than the other way around. We’ve forgotten that creativity doesn’t flow from the price tag of our supplies but from that childlike spark that made us pick up a pencil in the first place – that pure, unadulterated joy of making something exist that didn’t before, even if it looked like it was drawn by a caffeinated squirrel, named Ennis.



Let’s be honest – half the time I’m sitting here with the artistic confidence of a drunk penguin attempting interpretive dance. My lines wobble like a politician’s promises, and my attempts at perspective make M.C. Escher look like a strict realist. But here’s the beautiful paradox: I couldn’t care less if I tried. The sheer audacity of not knowing what I’m doing has become its own kind of superpower.

There’s something magnificently liberating about embracing your artistic incompetence with the enthusiasm of a golden retriever chasing its own tail. I’m scribbling away like a mad scientist’s journal entries, creating shapes that probably violate several laws of physics and maybe a few of geometry. My art style could best be described as “enthusiastic chaos meets questionable life choices,” with a dash of “what even is that supposed to be?”

But sweet heavens, am I having fun! The kind of unadulterated joy that usually requires either a prescription or a warning label. I’m doodling with the abandoned glee of a toddler who’s found an unguarded Sharpie, minus the property damage, inevitable time-out, and the utterance in unknown language from my mother. My creative process has all the sophistication of a sugar-rushed squirrel with an art degree, and I’m absolutely here for it.

In this moment, I’ve achieved a state of zen that monks spend decades trying to reach – the perfect balance of complete cluelessness and total contentment. It turns out that sometimes the secret to happiness is just letting your hand do whatever questionable things it wants to do on paper, while your inner art critic takes a much-needed vacation to somewhere far, far away.

Random Fiction – 02012025

FICTION – FREEWRITE


The things I know about love could be scribbled on a matchbook’s blank side with room left for a bad limerick. Truth is, the original matchstick instructions—strike here, light fuse, watch things burn—hold more practical wisdom. Over years of singed fingers and smoldered hopes, I’ve gathered scraps of survival tactics. Never trust words spoken in dim light or daylight; most folks peddle lies they’ve yet to realize themselves. Study their hands—the way they flutter like trapped moths when spinning tales. Watch for the split-second flicker in their eyes when truth barges in uninvited. But don’t stare too long, or you’ll become the mirror they’re desperate to avoid.

This isn’t some grand philosophy unearthed in a desert monastery. Just rusty tools to patch the hull when the ship’s taking water. Save the “real men don’t cry” bravado for locker rooms—we all drown the ache somehow. A twelve-pack of Bud, a heart-to-heart with Jack Daniel’s, or sobbing into a motel pillow while Springsteen croons about highways on the tinny alarm clock radio. At least tears don’t leave you waking to that look: a woman recoiling under crumpled sheets, eyes wide as a spooked deer’s. She’ll mutter something about quitting gin as she retreats to the bathroom, and you’ll mumble back about swearing off scotch, both knowing neither promise will outlast the coffee brewing in the stained pot.

The real art lies in the exit. You hand her a chipped mug, steam curling like a question mark between you. She sips, eyebrows lifting—not at the bitterness, but at the shock of you still being there. You brace for the verdict: Is the coffee better than the sex? A half-smile. A nod toward the door. No words, just the unspoken script we all memorize by 30. Dignity intact, you slip into the dawn, both already drafting tomorrow’s excuses.

Gypsy—my ‘65 Ford pickup—taught me more about commitment than any human. She’s been my co-conspirator since high school, back when her engine purred and her bench seat fit two (or three, if we got creative). These days, her love language is breaking down at cinematic moments: snowy backroads, midnight escapes from jealous husbands, and that one time outside Tulsa when her transmission gave up just as Margo’s daddy’s headlights crested the hill. The split lip was worth it. Can’t pay child support if you’re always in the rearview, right?

But the road—Christ, the road. It’s a confession booth on wheels. Twenty miles in, the hum of asphalt strips away the bullshit. Past regrets roll by like telephone poles: Lisa’s laugh in ‘08, the stillborn promise to quit smoking, your father’s hands on the steering wheel that last July. By mile 200, you’re raw enough to pull over and let the tears come—not the pretty kind, but the ugly, snot-dripping ones that scald your cheeks. You cry for the man you thought you’d be, for the love letters burned, for the quiet horror of becoming exactly what you mocked at 22. Then you wipe your face on a gas station napkin, buy a lukewarm Dr Pepper and a honeybun, and drive until the road starts making sense again. Or until it doesn’t. Either way, you keep moving.

Random Fiction – 01182025

FICTION-THIRD PERSON

He sat staring at a blank page, its pristine surface mocking his creative paralysis. The page looked back at him with the same vacant stare, a mirror to his emptiness, reflecting frustration and the void between inspiration and expression. Perhaps it was their shared moment of creative purgatory, each waiting for the other to break first.

He was wrestling with the ethereal image of silhouettes dancing at sunrise, their forms both defined and formless against the awakening sky. The vision burned clear in his mind, yet words slipped through his grasp like morning mist. He just sat there, attempting to mold his scattered thoughts into the precise architecture of verse, trying to conform his words to the image that haunted him, into some sort of perfect form or acceptable stanza that could capture the ephemeral dance he witnessed.

The words began to flow slowly like dawn creeping over the horizon. He formed the stanzas on a whim, yet they fell into the perfect meter as if guided by some hidden hand. It became clear his conformity knew no bounds, yet within those bounds, wild freedom emerged. Line after line, he wrote, as a gentle breeze from a cracked window caressed his face, carrying with it the whispers of dawn.

The morning unveiled itself in layers of sound and sensation. He began hearing the birds chirp their morning song of grace, nature’s poetry accompanying his creation, as the filled pages fluttered to the floor like autumn leaves. The final sputter of the coffee pot signaled a new pot made, a percussion of domestic ritual marking time’s passage. Inhaling deeply, he filled his lungs with the fresh aroma, drawing inspiration with each breath as he walked into the other room to retrieve more paper. He poured a cup, the dark liquid steaming with promise, and returned to his office.

He sat back down, possessed now by the urgency of creation, and finished the screaming tale of his soul. The words poured forth like a confession, raw and honest, each line a revelation. He leaned back in his office chair, serenaded by the creaking leather’s ancient song, a counterpoint to his racing thoughts. He took a sip of coffee, letting its warmth spread through him like liquid courage, and began reading the pages he had just created.

The first page danced with intention’s perfection, each word precisely placed, each phrase carefully crafted. But the remaining pages bellowed from his soul with increasing abandon, breaking free from the constraints of form and structure. It was clear that while he had truly captured the essence of those silhouettes’ dance, conformity only went so far before the truth demanded its own wild choreography. His words had become their own dawn dancers, moving to rhythms beyond his control, and he realized that sometimes the most perfect expression comes not from constraint but from letting go.

Still the Same

Daily writing prompt
What is the greatest gift someone could give you?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I reread my comments from a year ago, and they are as valid now as they were then. Here is what I had to say.

Hoodwinked – Revisited (Year Later)

Daily writing prompt
Are you a good judge of character?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I suppose everyone would love to say yes to the prompt question, and that would be correct, generally speaking. We have had a lifetime of experiences to teach about the content of one’s character—a lifetime of trial and error, a lifetime of being hoodwinked. Hoodwinked was the title of my response to this question a year ago. That post can be found here.

I think we want to take people at their word. For centuries, we have judged people based on so many different aspects that it would make your head spin. We’ve judged people by race, creed, religion, and sexual orientation. We never even bothered to find out what kind of person they were at the core. We have relied on stereotypes and preconceptions taught to us by society. Societal standards aren’t altogether false; we all have certain beliefs based on these standards. However, we have to be strong enough to stand up against the things that have proven false.

Let me take a moment and list a few things I have heard over the years. These examples should provide a clearer picture of the point I’m trying to illustrate.

  1. “The whole family has been trouble since I’ve known them. There isn’t a good one in the lot!”
  2. “Those Muslims are trying to kill us. It’s in their book.”
  3. “They chose to be that way. They are going to burn in hell.”
  4. “Shiftless and lazy has been my experience with them. They aren’t smart enough to understand what is really going on.
  5. “What do you expect from a woman?”

I’ve heard this nonsense in the last year, and it’s hard to believe that some of it is still being said. I won’t even touch some things I see on social media. The hardest pill to swallow is when the mess comes out of the mouth of someone you thought you knew. Events like these make you question your judgment. We sometimes change our opinion of someone based on a single action or statement. However, I suggest not reacting in haste because everyone has a bad day. Also, we have no idea of their struggles and haven’t shared.


Dr. Maya Angelou offers this advice.


I’ve found this quote to be quite helpful over the years. I’ve tried to minimize placing my expectations or principles on individuals and allowed them to be themselves. In some cases, you will be surprised by someone’s actions. I’ve been in situations where the least likely person came to my aid. You just never know. The only I can hope for is not to be hoodwinked.

Who, you calling soft?

Daily writing prompt
Is your life today what you pictured a year ago?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

A year ago, I had just begun dealing with my health issues and thought everything would be over in a few weeks. I just wanted everything to be over, and I could return to my life. Friends and family were on my case about taking a step back and focusing on my health. Of course, this advice was like a thousand spikes hammered into my ears. I didn’t want to step back from work, retire, or any other nonsense in that arena. Do you think I’m soft? I got this! Who are you calling soft? No one was calling me soft, but that was my mindset.

A few months later, I got better, like I said from the beginning. However, my health improvement was short-lived. It was non-existent if I’m honest about it. Nothing more than a figment of my imagination. The characters I create for my stories are closer to reality than my reprieve from illness. My condition worsened, forcing me into retirement, and I was pissed. Here’s the problem: I wasn’t sure what I was actually upset about. I had prepared financially for retirement in a year or so. 2026 was the target year, but I could retire at any time before that. However, I didn’t like the idea of being forced to do something. However, health-wise, I was in no condition to do anything but try to get better.

Well, it turns out that my condition was worse than I thought, to the point where it was almost impossible for me to make this post or any others. Yeah, the shit had got real. So, no, where I am today versus a year ago. Not even close. I’m blessed


Same Ole Stuff

Daily writing prompt
List your top 5 grocery store items.

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

  • Raw or Frozen Vegetables: This stems from nibbling on items grown in MiMi’s garden. No matter how many threats of death she hollered at me, I continued to nibble. However, I do remember there was a pepper on the counter that looked rather tasty and bit into it without a care. It burned my mouth somethings terrible. By the expression on MiMi’s face I always wondered if she set me up.
  • Canned Meat: I eat a ridiculous amount of tuna and white chicken chucks
  • Fresh Meat: Salmon, chicken, ground turkey and beef is brought regularly
  • Cat Food: Guppy sure eats alot for a cat that isn’t an aggressive eater. This is what the shelter said when I adopted her.
  • Sugary Treats: I typically eat rather healthy, but I find somehow these sugary treats keep appearing in the house. I think the shoppers feel sorry for me and slip these things into my order. I certainly don’t buy them, because they are “bad” for me.

A Notebook and Pen

Daily writing prompt
Your life without a computer: what does it look like?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I can remember a world when the personal computer was something we saw on television. Interestingly enough, computers were often portrayed as villains. So, I smile when I read this prompt, thinking about how much our world has become intertwined with computers. I spend a considerable amount of time working on one of my computers daily. My life without a computer will be significantly affected, but not as much as you might think.

Today, I spent most of the day working with a notebook and a pen. I was collecting my thoughts about a post I want to publish here. I used several references to gather the information I needed to establish the point I was trying to make. Yet, these references weren’t a product of a Google search but rather from my personal library. I reviewed various volumes of information about philosophy, religion, and psychology. I didn’t have to use my computer once. All I needed was a notebook and a pen.

REBLOG: Boy! What’s that Sh** on your lip, dirt?

Daily writing prompt
Tell us about your first day at something — school, work, as a parent, etc.

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Last year, I told the story of my first day in the military, which I thought would be appropriate for today’s prompt.

REBLOG: Let George Do It

Daily writing prompt
Have you ever performed on stage or given a speech?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Here is my previous response to the prompt

REBLOG: Walk, Don’t walk

Daily writing prompt
What are your favorite physical activities or exercises?

WordPress says I have already answered today’s prompt. Again, there is no sense repeating myself, so it’s REBLOG time.

Weekend Writing Prompt #390

Here is my response to the Weekend Writing Prompt – Diamond


Fractured light danced through the diamond’s heart, each facet holding a universe of trapped rainbows and whispered secrets.

Weekend Writing Prompt #389

Here is my response to the Weekend Writing Prompt – Hunter


The hunter moved through mist that tasted of stardust and forgotten dreams. Her arrows, woven from moonbeams, hung weightless in a quiver made of twilight shadows. Each step left crystalline footprints that bloomed into phosphorescent flowers, their petals humming ancient lullabies. Above, constellations rearranged themselves like curious children watching her passage. She was hunting something that existed between heartbeats, a creature born in the space between reality and imagination. Its trail was a ribbon of liquid silver, leading her deeper into a forest where trees whispered in languages lost to time.

Weekend Writing Prompt #393

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – PROSE

Here is my response to the Weekend Writing Prompt – Occident


Amidst the fading twilight of the Occident, ancient stories whispered through cobblestone streets, carrying echoes of empires long surrendered to time’s embrace.

Baked Goods

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – FICTION – WYDS

Here’s my response to Sadje’s WDYS

It was career day, and the children were excited to present their family members. You see some sat with their chest popped out, beaming with pride. While others did their best to appear innocent. They terrorize one another in the classroom or on the playground. Spitwads, mudballs, and name-calling are weapons in their arsenal. Yet, today, they are the perfect little angels their parents and grandparents believe them to be. I looked around the classroom, making sure all the children were present. The presentation was going to start at any moment. 

Echo came bursting through the door, water splashing from his bucket. Echo Gibbons was the only child who didn’t have anyone here for the presentation. Echo lived in foster care with Lida Jefferies, a local legend in town. She had helped so many children in their time of need, providing a stable and loving environment for them to strive in. Echo was no different. 

Echo went to the blackboard and began cleaning it. I heard the rumblings of some of his classmates calling him a brown noser under their breath. Their parents hushed them and then looked at me apologetically. I nodded and turned to watch Echo expertly clean the blackboards. He stood back and examined his work, dropping his rag in the bucket. He adjusted his hoodie and looked at me. 

“What do you think, Mr. Green?” he asked, I smiled and nodded.

”It looks perfect, Echo,” I replied, a slight smile crept up on his face. He grabbed his bucket and walked out of the room. Echo returned a few moments and sat in the corner by the window. There were some wonderful presentations. The children sat there listening with all smiles until Mr. Hill started talking about being a banker. I had never seen children fall asleep so fast. He brought charts and didn’t notice the kids napping. When he did, his face reddened, and he grabbed his things. He sat down in a huff. 

There was an aroma that filled the room. Lida Jeffries stood in the doorway with a pan of freshly baked croissants. The children gathered around her. Echo slipped past them and sat on her lap. She held him affectionately; it was the first time I saw the young man at peace. She told stories about the children she’d helped and even more stories about life. I learned something: if you want to hold the children’s attention, it’s all about the baked goods.

REBLOG: Real American Heroes

Daily writing prompt
What’s your favorite cartoon?

As it turns out, my favorite cartoon hasn’t changed in a year. Imagine that! I suppose I could make up something about how I loved SpaceGhost or He-Man, but I’d be lying, and you guys would see right through it

uld see right through it

Reena’s Xploration Challenge #359

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – FICTION (EXCERPT)

Here is my response to Reena’s Xploration Challenge #359


I walked in and pulled over the metal chair by a sliding door. I slid the door back and walked to the window. I sat down and leaned back in the chair, staring into the night sky. Closing my eyes and slowing my breathing, I prepared myself to see the possible scenarios I would face. I picked up something from a Tibetan. I cleared my mind of all the distractions. It wasn’t easy; it never was. The amount of baggage we carry around day to day is staggering. We cling to things we deem essential but are quite trivial in the larger scheme of things. The idea was to picture myself in a peaceful place. This place is different for everyone. Once you achieve the mediative state, the mind and spirit are in harmony, and the visions will come. Images flashed in my mind, displaying the different challenges that I might face. For each challenge, I came up with a possible solution. It wasn’t like I could see the future or anything, but I had been in this game long enough to know most of the problems I would face.


Author’s Note:

I’ve been working on a large writing project for the last month, and I wrote a portion of a larger scene in which the protagonist meditates. When taking a break earlier this week, I saw the above image, which stood out for some reason. I couldn’t place it at the time. I put the image on a separate scene, sat back, and let it talk to me. Then, it occurred to me why the picture was critical. I opened Scrivener, and sure enough, there was a note for me to work on that scene. So, I began to play with the scene using the picture. I decided to post this excerpt as I continued playing with the scene. Most likely, it will end up much different than what you see, but this sketch provides a good placeholder.

I Can’t Believe I’m Saying This…

Daily writing prompt
What could you do less of?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Over the last several years, I’ve been constantly complaining about the amount of time I don’t have. I can’t wait to retire so I can do what the hell I want… I remember going on about several times over the years. However, not that I’m here I find I have too much time on my hands. I occupy it with ridiculous projects. I’ve might have mentioned character analysis of the character’s in Superman universe. Now, let me ask you, if I were to write a post with my findings about the Superman’s character … would you care? I mean really?

Yes, I long for the days of being overworked and underappreciated by “the man” or wait… can we say, “the man” anymore?

Three Things Challenge – 12072024

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – 3TC – FICTION

The forest stood still, ancient and unyielding as if defying time itself. But now, a strange silence hung in the air—not the serene quiet of life breathing gently, but the uneasy hush of something amiss. The once-crystal stream that wound through the heart of the woods, a lifeline to countless creatures, was no longer clear. Its waters, tainted with an oily sheen, seemed to pollute the very essence of the forest’s soul.

A deer approached hesitantly, its hooves crunching softly on the brittle grass. It bent to drink but recoiled, sensing something wrong. The poison ran deeper than just the water; it was in the air, the earth, the whispers of the leaves. Who had done this? Who could destroy something so pure, so vital?

Perhaps it was the folly of man, always reaching, always taking. It was greed that sought to conquer instead of coexist. Or perhaps—just perhaps—it was the forest itself, tired of centuries of neglect, silently fighting back in ways no one yet understood.

The trees shivered as if sharing a secret, their shadows casting long and mournful patterns across the poisoned ground. And as the sun dipped below the horizon, the forest seemed to sigh, wondering if salvation was still possible in a world so carelessly polluted by those who claimed to love it.

My Editor will kill me when she reads this …

Daily writing prompt
What do you enjoy most about writing?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

One of my favorite parts of writing is the creation of the story. To listen to the story being told to my soul. I know that sounds a little strange, zany even, but this is how I feel whenever I pick up a pen and start writing a story. In this instance, I’m more of a recorder than a writer. Strange, I know, but it is like my pen has a mind of its own. Telling the story in bits and pieces. Sometimes, these fragments make sense, but for others, I have no idea where the fragments come from. It sounds exciting and a blast but isn’t the best part.

Editing is the best part. Once she reads this, my editor will tap into her editor’s magic and send thousands of those dreaded red marks to ensure my happiness. It will bring her joy as I scream in frustration and try to unravel the madness these red marks always bring. I can see her now. Her eyebrow raised, peering over her glasses, muttering something like the following …

“Really?” she says, looking at me bewildered. Which frightens me a bit because she doesn’t do bewilderment.

I look at her with all the confidence I can muster, hoping she buys it. I respond, “Yep!”

She holds my gaze, clearly not buying it. She picks up my latest draft and begins doing her thing. The once-white paper is now red with the faintest glimmers of white remaining. She tosses the draft on the table beside me, smirking, “Have fun!”

“What the f…” I reply

She chuckles harder, “Teaspoon.”

Of course, I don’t find the situation humorous at all. However, I begin the process. I clear the mechanism of doubt and start the next part of the journey.

Editing is the portion where, as writers, we shape our creation into something unexpected and unintended. If we are lucky, we allow it to grow into something magical. So many times, I’ve written things telling one story, but by the time I’m finished editing, it has become something else. Because of this, I’ve been able to reuse concepts to establish foundations or fill in gaps as needed.

There’s something about finding another storyline within a sentence or paragraph or scribbling a note on a napkin. So, excuse me as I prepare to get my butt kicked.

Lighthouse of Hope

POETRY – REFLECTION


When the war moved in, not the day it started, but the day it became real.
There are no bullets, no sound to remind you that you’re not home.
It’s the silence that creeps into your pores; now you know what unsettling means.
You taste the blood of the unhealed wounds, neath the scars you cleverly hide.

Sunlight radiates against your skin. You’re hot to the touch, drenched with sweat.
Yet, you stumble as you try to find your way through the darkness.
Searching for that light of hope, that fairytale, that legend we were taught to believe.
Something to cling to as we crash against the waves of uncertainty beating us into submission.

Suddenly, in the distance, we see it …

The Lighthouse of Hope


Authors note:

This piece was partially inspired by the opening line of Stacey C. Johnson’s piece called shelled.

REBLOG: Mangus’s Wild Kingdom

Daily writing prompt
Do you ever see wild animals?

For some reason, Jetpak likes to recycle questions for their prompts. Usually, when this happens, I either ignore the question or provide a different answer. However, my previous response is still valid since this prompt was only asked a few months ago.

Just Breathe

Daily writing prompt
Do you have a favorite place you have visited? Where is it?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

If you were to ask my late wife this question, she would respond that my favorite place to visit was my house. I was never home. It didn’t matter what country we lived in; it seemed like I dropped off her and the kids and then left. In many ways, she would be wrong. Often, I wonder how I didn’t end up a member of statistics concerning service members and the divorce rate. Military life isn’t for everyone. I’ve seen it break some of the nicest people. I watched them become caught in the churn of military life and drown in a slow, miserable death. Both service members and their families. I suppose I was lucky to a degree.

I don’t have a favorite place, per se; I have more like a region I enjoy spending time in, the Pacific Northwest. I have hundreds of stories about my travels in that area, but none accurately convey my feelings about traveling on Highway 101. I’ve traveled up and down that highway more than I could count. Once you start traveling north on that highway, the world changes. Northern California is completely different than Southern California. Once you cross the border into Oregon, the world changes. This magic repeats itself as you enter Washington.

I also enjoy the time I spent traveling through Montana, Wyoming, and even Idaho. The scenery is breathtaking. All one has to do to feel better is just breathe

Splendor

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – POETRY – MOONWASHED WEEKLY PROMPT

I traveled the world,
looking, searching
for the beauty promised
to us all.

The beauty often
overlooked, under appreaciated
perhaps, I don’t know
take a moment

To bask the beauty
of it’s splendor

I Remember When This Stuff Mattered

Daily writing prompt
Share five things you’re good at.

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I remember being at an age when I took stock of my skills and abilities and wondered if these things defined the person I was supposed to become. Over the years, I have realized that titles, lists, or attributes aren’t what shape you. Our strengths and weaknesses change over time. Things we were good at when we were young may seem impossible to accomplish now. We may not even figure out how we did them in the first place. As we age, new abilities surface we never knew we possessed. Hopefully, we have gained wisdom along with experiences in life. We do the best we can with what we have to work with.

I sit smiling, remembering when this stuff mattered.

Weekend Writing Prompt #392

CHALLENGE RESPONSE –WWP


Buzzing bees swarm through golden meadows, dancing with summer’s whispers.

Something like this…

What does your ideal home look like?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE


My Personal Library

Not exactly, but something like this since we dreaming and all

Khan’s Records & Tapes

What alternative career paths have you considered or are interested in?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I’m satisfied with the career path I chose. Could I have done something different? Definitely! However, the goal was to provide for my family, and I did that. So, in this regard, I’m good. I have always wanted to write, and I’m a writer. I wanted to make a difference or do something that mattered. I was a soldier. The best job ever is being a parent. It doesn’t get any better than that for me.

I’ve retired young, so I could return to work once my health improves if I want. The question is, what would I do? It would be something I enjoy, something that brings joy and meaning to my life and others.



I could play Watermelon Man or Blinded by the Light and get a second. It would be expected, even appreciated.

Here’s a sample of the stuff that would be playing over the loudspeakers …

I’m a Night Owl … by G-d

Daily writing prompt
Are you more of a night or morning person?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I used to have a bedtime that I fought tooth and nail. I couldn’t wait until I became an adult to do what I wanted. You know, to stay up until the roosters crow and all that. Then, I got a job where four hours of sleep was a luxury. I spent most of my time working through the night. I’d pass out when the dawn came. Things seemed to be quieter in the daytime. Well, at least until after morning coffee. I’ve been wired that way for so long that it’s hard to be any other way.

Now that I’m older, I enjoy the stillness of the night. It is so peaceful and quiet. I can get a lot done during this time.

Honesty and integrity

What principles define how you live?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I spent most of my developing a simple code to live by. Though there are several aspects and layers concerning the code I developed, it boils down to these two variables. I live by two main principles; honesty and Integrity. It’s just that simple.

Reading That Shaped My World

List three books that have had an impact on you. Why?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

  • The Green Mile – To be haunted by the actions of your past. To see everything you know and love die. To be left on this earth and witness their demise. One realizes the dead were the lucky ones. To feel the blessing of a long life is a curse. Perhaps, a punishment for a hideous act.
  • Invisible Man – In this novel, we follow the actions of an unnamed protagonist living in a society that chooses not to recognize him as a man. The winner of the National Book Award in 1953, this novel should depict an outdated social construct, but it doesn’t, sadly.
  • 11/22/63 – This book addresses something we all may have wanted to do from time to time. A chance to go back in time and change something we have done. However, the most powerful part for me, was how it laid out the hazards of time travel. I will continue working on the time machine in my basement.

You’re Kidding, right?

Do you trust your instincts?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

If you can’t trust yourself, who can you trust? This is the question that comes to mind when I read this prompt. With the social climate of the last few decades, many have made fortunes in the “Doubt” business. I talked to one of these individuals once, and when I questioned their motives, I quickly became a nonbeliever and radiated large amounts of negative energy. I looked around to see if they had some device that measured energy levels. I was asked to leave when I asked them to present this device. I’m still sad about the event, not at all.

My intuition has saved my butt more times than I can count. So, I trust it. However, I must admit there have been times it has stirred me wrong, mainly partly due to my lack of knowledge of the situation. The other part was the person in charge of the situation seemed shady. I don’t do shady people, as a general rule. However, sometimes they can be rather useful. In cases like these, I adjust the settings on my shade – meter. Overexposure can be harmful, and it takes a while to recover from its effects.

Believing in yourself or trusting yourself are useful tools in building self-reliance, developing personal growth, and strengthening one’s emotional intelligence. I’ve heard people mock the use of gut feelings and demand the use of actual data or science. This is funny because when people use their gut feelings, they combine their knowledge, experiences, and science. Yep, I said science. The issue resides in people’s inability to articulate why they feel a particular way. So, continue trusting your instincts.

Let me provide an example; my editor can read something of mine and say something like this.

“I don’t like it. Don’t ask me why, but there’s something not right.”

When we first started working together, this was some frustrating shit. However, I’ve learned to keep my mouth shut and listen over the years. More times than not, there’s, sure enough, something jacked in my draft.

Smart people say gut feelings are like using a muscle; the more you use it, the stronger it becomes. They recommend continuing to gain knowledge and experience and living life. So, believe and trust yourself; you may very be justified in having pause. So, when someone asks me whether or not I trust my gut. My response is always:

“You’re Kidding, Right?”

Pangs of Madness

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – FICTION

I love the fall; the colors are just as magical as spring. There is beauty in every season if you open your mind to see it. The color resided in the fact that it had the ability to make forget about the madness in the world—the madness that had the potential to destroy every fiber of decency that remained. So, we needed moments like these, moments where the fiery red of the leaves blended with the purplish hues of the space between that made the white of the snow-covered ground have a bluish tint. Moments of otherness.

I stood with an unlit straight hanging from my lips. The temperature dropped enough that you could see your breath. Winter was around the corner. Soon, Winter’s talons would be crawling at your skin. There have been more and more days like these lately. Another horrid crime scene was behind me. An example of the madness this beautiful scene would help me escape, even if it’s just for a little while. I could hear the crunch of footsteps against the snow and turned to see Lt. Rawlins.

Lieutenant Benjamin Rawlins stepped up next to me and stood silently. He wore an expressionless face—the look I was used to seeing. At the last crime scene, he was a pot of emotions on the verge of boiling over. He chewed on the end of his signature cigar. He always smoked the cheap ones. His wife said the good ones were too expensive to be chewed on. An expression that told me he was feeling exactly what I was feeling. We have both been doing this long enough where words weren’t necessary.

“There’s nothing like the fall colors right before winter,” Rawlins remarked as he spit out the chewed-up portion of his cigar. It looked like he would be needing a fresh one before long. I nodded in agreement.

“You gonna get this __” Rawlins broke off due to his promise to his wife when the first grandchild arrived. I stared at him, and he met my gaze. I nodded.

“Before Christmas? I don’t want the city to be in unrest during the season.” Rawlins remarked. Lists of children naughty and nice, letters to Santa, and horrible, well-intended Christmas gifts always gave me a warm fuzzy. Yet, you couldn’t ignore the magical elements of the holiday. So many people were absolutely impossible for most of the year, but they became something else during this season. Only a few weeks later, they seemed to forget the promise of hope and return to the drudgery. It’s disheartening and sad.

I shrugged and lit my cigarette. I took a deep drag, exhaled, and said, “Patience, Boss.” Rawlins stopped chewing, and I felt his gaze. His face reddened with rage, not at me, but at the idea, someone was in his city doing these hideous acts. He swallowed it, but not before he chucked away the remainder of his cigar in frustration.

“Detective Casey,” he began in that low growl graded against my soul. I reached out and gripped his shoulder, “Patience, Boss. We’ll get him, I promise.” Rawlins nodded and walked away. I watched him get into his sedan and leave. I knew better than to make promises in cases like these. It was possible we would catch a break and catch the killer, but it was more likely that we wouldn’t even come close to apprehending the killer. It was the pang of madness.


Authors Note:

I’ve been participating in this year’s NaNoWriMo, so I haven’t been active on WordPress as usual. Yesterday, I completed the word count requirements, but they’re far from complete, so I decided to take a break and read some challenges. It’s always fun participating. While reading today, I noticed a few that caught my eye.

I used the following prompt to draft the opening sequence of the chapter of my ongoing work.

Moonwashed Weekly Prompt – Otherness and the enchanting image provided the imagery in the opening paragraph. It helped me add a bit of beauty to the gritty, grimy story I’ve been working on this month. Thanks, Eugi!

Ragtag Daily Prompt – Chew, Patience, and Shallow provided depth in the character interactions. Thanks Guys!

Esther’s Writing Prompts – Adding a pleasant element to my grisly tale. Thank you!

My Virtual Zoo

Daily writing prompt
What are your favorite animals?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I’ve loved animals all my life and had some wonderful times with them, as well as a few close calls with them. Now that I’m older, the type of animals I enjoy is small, but not as small as I would like. Still, I find myself fascinated by their power, grace, and awesomeness.

Here is some of the artwork of my favorites:

The Coffee List

Daily writing prompt
If you could meet a historical figure, who would it be and why?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

When I was younger, I made two lists. One was famous people I would have a conversation with over a cup of coffee. The other list of historical people that I thought needed to be throat punched. Now, my wife wasn’t a fan of either list. In fact, every time she caught me making an entry, she gave me something to do. Sighs, the misplaced passion of youth. Where would we be without it?

As a track & field athlete, this photo meant a great deal to me.

The establishment of my era still turned their noses up each time they saw this photo. This photo and others were considered taboo, or if I use the phrase I heard the most, they were “troublemakers.” Martin Luther King, Jesus, or “The Last Supper” in most of my friends’ homes. However, I spent most of my time reading about people who stood against injustice. This was the beginning of the coffee list.

Recently, I had the pleasure of rehashing the glory days with some old friends. The above came up. We all were athletes, and it was important to us. However, I didn’t care much for it, but I understood its significance in the movement. We discussed the civil rights movement at length that day, even though none of us were alive to participate during critical periods. We talked about what we were doing to fulfill MLK’s dream. We questioned whether how our sacrifices would benefit our children and grandchildren. As you can imagine, this was a very long conversation and was getting heavier by the second. So, I decided to lighten the mood.

I held up my phone with the above photo and asked, “Who’s the white guy?” None of us knew, but of course, we had the guy that sputters

“Oh man, I can’t remember his name…Damn!”

We have two of these individuals in our group, and they take turns uttering that phrase. Once, I wanted to see which one said it the most. After several months of observing, it was a tie, and I figured the game was rigged just to skew my data. Yes, I’m the guy who always gathers data.

Well, the gentleman’s name was Peter Norman. Here are a few facts about him.


Peter George Norman was an Australian track athlete born in Melbourne, Australia, on June 15, 1942. He grew up in a devout Salvation Army family and worked as an apprentice butcher before becoming a physical education teacher.

Norman’s athletic career began when he joined the Melbourne Harriers, and he won his first major title, the Victoria junior 200m championship, in 1960. He excelled in sprinting, becoming a five-time national 200-meter champion and representing Australia at the 1966 Commonwealth Games in Jamaica, where he won bronze medals in the 220-yard and 4×110-yard relay.

The defining moment of Norman’s career came at the 1968 Summer Olympics in Mexico City. In the 200-metre final, he stunned everyone by claiming the silver medal with a personal best time of 20.06 seconds, setting an Oceanic record that still stands today. However, the events that followed on the medal podium would forever change Norman’s life and cement his place in history.

As Norman stood on the podium alongside gold medalist Tommie Smith and bronze medalist John Carlos, the two American athletes raised their black-gloved fists in a Black Power salute while playing the U.S. national anthem. This powerful gesture was intended to highlight systemic segregation and racism in the United States. Though not raising his fist, Norman chose to stand in solidarity with Smith and Carlos by wearing an Olympic Project for Human Rights badge on his jacket.

Norman’s decision to support the protest was not without consequences. Upon returning to Australia, he faced unofficial sanctions and was ridiculed as the “forgotten man” of the Black Power salute. Despite qualifying for the 1972 Munich Olympics, Norman was not selected to represent Australia and never competed in the Olympics again.

Throughout his life, Norman remained committed to his beliefs in human rights and never regretted his actions on the podium. He continued to be involved in athletics administration and Olympic fundraising and even worked on organizing the 2000 Sydney Olympics.

Norman passed away on October 3, 2006, at the age of 64, due to a heart attack. In a poignant tribute, Smith and Carlos served as pallbearers at his funeral.

In the years following his death, Norman’s role in the historic protest has gained increased recognition. In 2012, the Australian Parliament formally apologized for the treatment he received after the 1968 Olympics. In 2019, a statue of Norman was unveiled in Albert Park, Melbourne, honoring his athletic achievements and his stand for human rights.

Peter Norman’s legacy extends far beyond his athletic accomplishments. His courageous decision to stand in solidarity with Smith and Carlos during a pivotal moment in the civil rights movement demonstrates the power of allyship and the importance of standing up for one’s beliefs, even in the face of adversity. Norman’s story serves as a reminder that sometimes, the most significant acts of bravery occur not in the spotlight but in quiet moments of support and solidarity.


After reading articles about Mr. Norman, I wondered how I missed him. Better yet, why was his namen’t mentioned like everyone else’s? At any rate, Peter Norman makes The Coffee List.

Dancing in the Dark

POETRY – RELEASING

My camel smolders between my index and forefingers
I drink the last drop of Guinness. I close my eyes as its taste lingers.
I order another, drinking it down, trying to drown my despair.
However, it takes me nowhere.
I stand up, trying my best to be cool.
I swagger across the floor, looking like a complete fool.
I cross the room, grabbing anything necessary
Stopping when I needed to be stationary
Finally, I reach the glow of the box.
I hold it while my eyes slowly focus.
I look for anything that rocks.
I dig in my pocket and fish for some quarters
while I try desperately to complete my order.
I drop the coin in their slot,
Clickity,
Clickity,
Clack
metallic splash
the coins reach their new home.
I weave from side to side, waiting for the sounds of madness
The guitar plays a power chord through my soul.
My arms outstretched, and my fingers pop.
My head and hips sway to the rhythm of its melody.
Two steps forward, three steps back.
My eyes squeezed tight as the sound soothed me just right.
I danced by myself in the dark and didn’t give it another thought.

Thank you for readng

The Outer Office

Daily writing prompt
What is your favorite place to go in your city?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

My favorite spot in my city is the park. It serves as my outer office. I’ve worked on countless stories and come up with just as many ideas. I sit and watch the things that happen in the park. Some days, I break out my camera and take pictures of the things around me. Some of these photos aren’t of anything special, but for some reason, they evoke a thought or conjure an idea. On other days, I sit and allow nature to cleanse my soul. A reboot, if you will. There are numerous parks in my area. All of them offer something different. So, I never run out of inspiration.

Mama’s Boy

Daily writing prompt
What’s the first impression you want to give people?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

As a young man, I had this insane desire to be liked. I wanted to be considered cool and all that. Then, one day, something peculiar happened. I stopped giving a s**t about what people thought of me and focused on becoming the person I was destined to be. Of course, I didn’t have any philosophical phrasing back then, but the sentiment and emotion driving it remain true. However, despite my severe lack of interest in what others thought of me, something kept me in line. I needed to be a son my Mom could be proud of. I never wanted to let her down. She made far too many sacrifices to be a disappointment to her. So, most of the decisions I have made in life. I keep in mind what my mom would say about this. Make no mistake, I’m my own man; Mom raised me that way. But I use her example as a guide.

Rabbit’s Foot – Are they really lucky?

Daily writing prompt
What’s the coolest thing you’ve ever found (and kept)?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

My Mom had transferred me to a new school. Not only was I the new kid, but I was also the only Black kid, so things were immediately interesting. The world wasn’t as inclusive then as it is now. Despite these challenges, I made a friend. Most of the children were polite, but this guy was my friend for a while. We’d play after school, shooting baskets, skipping rocks, etc. Well, one day, we found a rabbit’s foot. It was exciting and all that, but I quickly forgot about it.

A few years ago, one of the girls from that school reached out on one of the socials. Once she discovered me, she broadcast to the rest of the class. So, my friend contacted me. He sent me a picture of that same rabbit’s foot we found over 40 years old. That picture officially made that rabbit’s foot cool. This story may not be the coolest thing I have found, but it makes me smile every time I think about it. Our lives are made up of tiny moments like these, and we should cherish them.

Walk, Don’t walk

Daily writing prompt
What is your favorite form of physical exercise?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I grew up during a time when parents seemed to be allergic to giving their children rides anywhere. Our main modes of transportation were riding your bike, public transportation, and the infamous walking. Walking wasn’t a form of exercise in those days it was a necessity. So, we, got a good laugh when the trend “Power Walking” emerged. It went right along with Jazzercise, step – something, and who could forget Tae-Bo. Here’s an example of power walking from the famous, but hilarious film, Doctor Detroit (1983).

I was a track athlete in those and remember walking home from practice or walking to just about everything I wanted to do. Portable cassette players had emerged so we would listen to our favorite while numerous treks. And wouldn’t you know once I joined the military, we something called road marches, so my walking days were far from over.

What I have always enjoyed about walking to provides me chance to clear my head without over exerting myself like when running. Running there was a target heart rate, distance, and time goals set. With walking it was just walking. I still enjoy walking today. I never was a fast walker, unless I was road marching where we would 12 miles in a few hours. I enjoy leisurely walk that I vary speeds and tempo.

Here are a few of favorite songs about walking.

I’ve always liked the groove of this Nancy Sinatra classic. Every time I listen to it, I rock back and forth.

However, my all-time favorite song about walking is by Prince & the NPG. Here that track …

Everything … most things

Daily writing prompt
What is good about having a pet?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I can’t imagine life without some sort of pet. I didn’t always have them, but once I got one, I was hooked. Now, I’m unlike some other pet owners I know. I’m talking about the ones who buy strollers and cute sweaters. There is no judgment here. I’ve also been known to spoil my pets, but my spoiling consists of ridiculous amounts of food that is most likely not very healthy.

I’ve been primarily a dog owner for most of my life, but it’s been all about the cats lately. As a cat dad, I have never had a pet before. Like dogs, they each have their own personality, and getting to know them is a treat. I’ve found that some cats act like dogs and follow you around as you walk through the house while they look at you crazy. I enjoy watching them sit and talk smack to me, like I speak cat or something. My first hid somewhere in the house for two weeks, until one day, she decided to jump on my lap without any warning.

She crossed the “Rainbow Bridge” a few months back, and it was severely difficult to deal with. I lost two cats that week, and I thought I wouldn’t be able to have another pet. I remember this pain from the first I lost one of my Rotties. I didn’t think I would be affected, but I was wrong. Soph and Ajna were rescues. Soph’s original mom passed, and Ajna’s mom couldn’t keep her anymore. So they didn’t get along, but they kept it civil. I think it was primarily for my benefit, and I thank them.

I have a new fuzzball named Guppy. She is another rescue, but she is completely different from others. She sleeps on one of my printers and talks smacks on the regular. It cracks me up. I was supposed to have rescued them, but in truth, they rescued me. So, I think everything is awesome about having a pet, but when they cross the “Rainbow Bridge, ” that blows!

Share Your World – 11112024

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – SHARE YOUR WORLD

I’ve always liked this challenge but haven’t participated in it in a while.

1.  If reincarnation exists, would you like to come back as a domestic pet or a wild animal? I don’t think reincarnation works this way, but it would be cool if it did. However, I can’t decide which one. As domestic pet life is sweet, just ask my cat. Yet, as a wild animal, all that power and freedom.

2. Do you think Zoos are a good idea? As a child, the zoo was within walking distance and free. I spent time watching the wild cats and the monkeys, so I loved them. However, now I don’t feel the same way. I can’t stand watching them in that environment, none of them. I think all species should be free in their own habitat.

3.  Have you ever been to a safari park? Nope, never wanted to go. I’ve seen my share of wild animals. Sometimes, I was freaked out. They look smaller on television and in magazines. I know this example isn’t a safari, but watching wild mustangs run wild was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I considered letting a mountain lion eat my little brother once, but I figured I would have trouble explaining to his mother how I let this happen to her baby.

4.  Have you visited an oceanarium? Once, it was so freaking cool, but I still think about them as I do about zoos. They should be free no matter how cool they are swimming around stuff. Oh my gosh, the dolphins.

The Neighorhood

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – FICTION – FFFC #288

Authors Note:

When I looked at this image, I had no idea what I would do with it. Literally, nothing came to me. So, I read what others had done with it, and still, no joy. I noticed that Melissa had provided a description of the image—something I think she always does. I’ve seen it before, but it made no impact until this challenge.

I took the description and rendered several images from it. Then, I started playing around with the description. All of a sudden, I had a voice. I looked around to see where it was coming from. I thought maybe my iPad was reading a book, or another of my gadgets had decided to push me over the edge. Nothing. Everything was functioning properly, but isn’t that how it works in the movies? Everything is working correctly when you go to check it.

Anyway, I returned to working on the images when I had the voice again, much louder this time. The voice was telling a story about his friend after his mother’s funeral. Then, I realized I wasn’t losing my mind, but a character was speaking to me. I’ve no clue where he’s going with his story or why he decided to tell me. It doesn’t even have a name. It has been a long time since I had a new character shown up. If I’d known, I would have tidied up a bit.


The Neighborhood

It was a lovely service; Mrs. Byrne would have been proud. No one liked to attend funerals, but they appreciated them being done correctly. Over the years, I remember her mentioning bits of this and that she saw at the different services. She mentioned some more than once, so I added everyone we could remember in her service. Her daughter Ivy had been my best friend since I showed up in the neighborhood at five years old.

My older brother Sean and I moved into the neighborhood after cancer had taken our Mom. Cancer is cruel, and it took its time taking our Mom. Pop lost his job at the plant because he refused to leave our mother’s side at the end. It took five months to cross the Rainbow Bridge and years to prepare for the journey. Her death broke Pop, but somehow, he pulled it together once we moved to the neighborhood. At least for a little while.

The neighborhood was three miles long and ten blocks deep, filled with Irish Catholics, and our Black faces weren’t exactly welcome. Mr. Flannery was Pop’s best friend, and he convinced a friend of his to rent to us. Pop got a job doing demolition. Pop said he had a lot of anger to work off, so the job was perfect. Sean was a teenager when we moved there and had rougher than I did. He’d come home with bruises most days until one day, he didn’t.

I played in the yard by myself most of the time until a red-haired girl with pigtails stood there looking at me one day. She didn’t say a word.

“There are swings a couple of blocks from here,” she said. I stared at her, knowing I couldn’t leave the yard. Yet, something this girl made me want to risk a trashing.

She continued to stare momentarily, then started walking away. I went to the fence and watched her. She turned and looked back, then stopped.

“You coming?” ” You aren’t a pansy, are you?” she asked. In seconds, I was walking next to her. We talked all the way to the park about the usual stuff. She told me Spider-Man was the best superhero ever, and Wonder Woman was a close second. I knew she was crazy because it was Batman, then the Green Arrow.

We played all day, swinging and climbing trees. She fell out of the tree and skinned her elbow. I leaned and kissed it. It was something my mother did when I got a boo-boo. Ivy punched me in the arm.

“You ought to know a girl’s name before you go kissing on her.” she said, smiling. She had one of her front teeth missing, but that stopped that smile one bit.

“I’m Ivy, Ivy Bryne,” she said, sticking out her hand.

“Frank Anders,” I said, shaking her hand. I gave her a soft handshake because she was a girl and punched me again.

“My dad, you give a person a firm handshake. Try it again,” she said, sitting her hand back out. I gave her a proper handshake and went back to swinging. I saw Sean coming over the crest of the hill, and he didn’t look pleased. Ivy and I met him before he got to the swings.

“See you tomorrow, Frankie,” she said and ran off.


FFFC #293

I was standing in the garage smoking a cigarette pacing back and forth when I heard Ivy come in. She always walks hard in her heels. I don’t think she’s taking a graceful step in heels since I’ve know her. Most of the time, she could be found sporting a pair of sandals or sneakers when the weather bad.

“Did you know, Mom was into photography?” Ivy asked, before I could respond she launched into the next question typically Ivy. It always seemed like she wasn’t interested in your response, just your attention. You were to listen until there was break which usually meant your response was required, but sometimes you missed the opening that prompted, “Hello, earth to Frankie! Aren’t you listening to me?” I’ve gotten better over the years catching my cues and today was no different.

Ivy was going around this new discovery about her mother when a few photos fell out of the binder she holding. One was a picture of a crane with it’s beak pointing skyward and the other was a picture of a eagle with a mountain landscape in the background. Wonderful shots I thought. Mrs. B had really found her thing. She had confided, years ago, that felt she had lost a portion of herself being a mother. She had no regrets raising her children, but she should have carved out more time for herself.

The binder slammed Ivy was biting her bottom lip trying to hold back the tears. I didn’t understand why. If these was a time to cry, this was it. However, Ivy never wanted to be considered a punk and she wasn’t by far the toughest person I knew. Tears streamed from her reddened swollen eyes. There emerald hue seemed to sparkle in the light. Yet, she held back the wail. I always loved those eyes. She rushed towards me burying her head in my chest.

The muffled banshee cry grew louder by the second. The harder she wailed, the tighter she squeezed.

“It’s alright, baby. Let it go,” I whispered

Podcasts aren’t my thang

Daily writing prompt
What podcasts are you listening to?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Listening to podcasts, really isn’t my thang. I suppose I missed the movement. However, I have spent a considerable amount of time on internet radio. I was even a host for a number of years. I unsure if internet radio has been rebranded to podcasts, if so, cool, if not okay. I have listened to a few but are mainly podcasts done by people I interact with either in person or here on WordPress. When I have listened to podcasts they deal with following subjects.

  1. Writing
  2. Music
  3. Film

I have noticed that are a few podcasts dealing with AI and other technology subjects that look interesting. I realize that a bit old fashioned on how I absorb information, but its worked for several decades. I’m not above making changes, it just takes a bit to warm up to the idea. I get my history, philosophy, and psychology fixes from books and articles. In the last decade or so, I’ve developed a liking for audiobooks. They provide the ability to move around while my brain is still being stimulated.

Believing in Myself

What have you been putting off doing? Why?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Somewhere along the way, I forgot how to do it. It’s strange actually. I can’t recall the precise moment when it happened. It’s like it stolen in the night by some silent rogue. Perhaps, I was victim of an assassin. Not the way we usually view, but the way that makes you experience the thing worse than death. It funny because that fate is different for everyone.

One would think that now I realize what has happened it would be easily reobtained. For me, this doesn’t seem to be the case. It’s like it been put into my special hiding place. The place where I put the things I want to keep safe. I stand at the door looking the room where it should be, but I can’t remember where it is in that room.

I know with patience I discover all the things within this room. It’s secrets, its treasures, and it’s grace by believing in myself.

Small Scene Addiction

Daily writing prompt
How do you manage screen time for yourself?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Several years ago, I posted the following somewhere on one of my socials.

“Curb your addiction; Netflix is not a lifestyle.”

I said this because, at the time, Netflix was the hottest new thing. I believe we should read and spend with our families instead of having faces glued to a screen. It remains my opinion on the matter. However, the current trends and versatility of mobile devices aren’t lost on me. I read the other day and posted on this blog every day for over six months. Looking back at that period, I realize it was done using one of my mobile devices.

My preferences are my desktop for any major creative endeavor, such as video or photo editing, and my laptop when I’m writing fiction. One can’t go anywhere without observing someone lost on their screens. I suppose it is the way of the world, as they say. However, I was amazed when I discovered that someone studied this behavior and named it. It’s called Small Screen Addiction.

Here are the particulars:

Understanding Small Screen Addiction

Overview of the Issue:

Small screen addiction, often referred to as screen dependency disorder, is a growing concern among children and adolescents. This phenomenon encompasses excessive use of devices such as smartphones, tablets, and computers, leading to compulsive behaviors that can negatively impact mental and physical health. As technology becomes increasingly integrated into daily life, understanding the implications of screen addiction is crucial for parents, educators, and health professionals.

Extent of Screen Addiction:

Research indicates that a significant number of young people exhibit signs of screen addiction. A 2021 survey by Common Sense Media revealed that 75% of teenagers felt compelled to respond immediately to notifications, while another study found that teens checked their smartphones a median of 51 times per day. Symptoms of screen addiction include preoccupation with screens, withdrawal symptoms when not using devices, and a loss of interest in activities previously enjoyed. The American Academy of Pediatrics has raised alarms about the detrimental effects of excessive screen time on children’s development and well-being.

Mental and Physical Health Consequences:

The consequences of small screen addiction are multifaceted. Physically, children may experience issues such as insomnia, back pain, vision problems, and headaches due to prolonged screen exposure. Psychologically, increased screen time is linked to higher rates of anxiety, depression, and social isolation. Studies have shown that children who spend excessive time gaming or on social media are at greater risk for mental health issues. Furthermore, the addictive nature of screens can disrupt normal brain development in children, affecting areas responsible for impulse control and empathy.

Behavioral Indicators:

Parents and guardians should be vigilant for signs that may indicate a child is struggling with screen addiction. Key indicators include:

  • Preoccupation with screens: Constantly thinking about or planning to use devices.
  • Withdrawal symptoms: Experiencing irritability or anxiety when unable to access screens.
  • Loss of interest in other activities: Neglecting hobbies or interests that do not involve screens.
  • Aggressive behavior: Increased irritability or aggression when screen time is limited.

Strategies for MitigationTo combat small screen addiction, experts recommend several strategies:

  • Establish Screen Time Limits: Setting clear boundaries on daily screen usage can help manage exposure.
  • Encourage Alternative Activities: Promoting physical activities or hobbies that do not involve screens can foster healthier habits.
  • Model Healthy Behavior: Parents should demonstrate balanced screen use to set a positive example for children.
  • Utilize Technology Mindfully: Encourage mindful engagement with technology using apps that track usage and promote breaks.

When reading this information, I was taken back primarily by the initial data focusing on the small-scene addiction effect on children. It makes me want to visit all the grandchildren and snatch their phones away. “Gave a damn book!” I see myself yelling in my rant. Of course, my grandchildren would look at me and wonder what Peepaw was going on as they glanced up from their screens. I’d have no hope of assistance from my children because they would wonder about the recipe, outfit, and lifestyle of a person they haven’t a clue about.

However, this got me wondering about the effects of small-screen addiction in adults. Here’s what I found.

Physical Health Effects

Eye Strain and Vision Problems

  • Prolonged screen use can cause digital eye strain, leading to symptoms like dry eyes, blurred vision, and headaches.
  • Excessive screen time may increase the risk of myopia (nearsightedness).

Musculoskeletal Issues

  • Poor posture from prolonged screen use can result in neck, shoulder, and back pain.
  • Repetitive motions can lead to conditions like carpal tunnel syndrome.

Sleep Disruption

  • Blue light emitted by screens can interfere with melatonin production, disrupting natural sleep cycles.
  • This can lead to insomnia and poor sleep quality.

Sedentary Lifestyle

  • Excessive screen time often correlates with reduced physical activity, potentially contributing to obesity and related health issues.

Mental Health Effects

Anxiety and Depression

  • Studies have shown a link between excessive screen time and increased risks of anxiety and depression in adults.

Cognitive Changes

  • Screen addiction can lead to structural changes in the brain, particularly in the frontal lobe, affecting attention span, decision-making, and emotional control.

Social Isolation

  • Excessive screen use can lead to withdrawal from real-world social interactions, potentially causing feelings of loneliness and social isolation.

Stress and Mood Disturbances

  • Constant connectivity and information overload can increase stress levels.
  • Compulsive checking of devices can lead to mood swings and irritability.

Reduced Productivity

  • Screen addiction can interfere with work performance and daily responsibilities.

Attention and Focus Issues

  • Frequent multitasking across devices can lead to difficulty maintaining focus and reduced cognitive control.

Other Effects

Dopamine Feedback Loop

  • Screen use can activate the brain’s dopamine reward system, creating addictive patterns similar to substance addictions.

Altered Brain Chemistry

  • Prolonged screen addiction can potentially alter brain chemistry and structure, affecting areas responsible for cognitive control and emotional regulation.

Well damn! This is the only thing I could say after reading this data. Excuse me while I charge my phone and iPad and process this data.

If You Have Enough Time? … You do!

Daily writing prompt
Do you need time?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I read this question and wondered what they meant. I’ve said it a thousand times if I’ve said it once.

“I don’t have time”

or

“I need more time.”

In the military, we have said, “We train to standard, not to time.”. One of those really cool sayings doesn’t always apply. However, as I progressed in ranks, I realized that prior planning or proper planning removes most of the anxiety associated with time constraints. We used a system called After Action Reviews (AAR’s) and later became lessons learned. We would evaluate an exercise and make note of things that went well as well as our failures.

The purpose of this action was to devise a plan to achieve a greater degree of success. Ideally, this plan was placed in a binder for review at a later date. The binder also served as a guide in case of a personnel change. The problem with every system isn’t the system itself, although that is sometimes the case. Rather, the lack of personnel utilizing the system results in the utterance of the above-listed questions.

Now, I won’t sit here and say there weren’t instances where we needed to make adjustments on the fly—there were plenty. However, the majority of the situations when we felt a time crunch were due to a lack of planning or learning from previous mistakes. I have developed an expansion of this philosophy as I have aged.

We have the same amount of time today as yesterday and tomorrow. The first time I said this idea about time to someone, I was told that Daylight Saving Time defeats my logic. I laugh because I feel it isn’t true. The key to successful time management is how we utilize the time we have, which is a constant. So, whatever system or techniques you may use, don’t worry about if you have enough time because you do.

Why would I want to do that?

Is there an age or year of your life you would re-live?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Fortunately, I’ve reached the age where the heyday has become a part of the conversation. However, with that age, I also have times when talking to the family and other younger people when I have no idea what the hell they are talking about. especially when they tell you a phrase you have been using before they were born, “Doesn’t mean what you think it means,” as if history has been erased. But, to be fair, I often say things where they are completely clueless. One of my last co-workers used to shake, smile, and shake her head like she understood. I confronted her about it after she didn’t do what I asked. Her response, “I’m not going lie, I heard words, but didn’t know what the hell you were talking about.”

Sure, I can remember some amazing moments and horrific ones. These moments shape us into the people we are. So, when it comes to reliving stuff, why would I want to do that?


Weekend Writing Prompt #387

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – WWP

thrills of change scatter plans, reflections of forgotten dreams, in the unexpected wind and rain.

Why Can’t you Answer Questions like a Normal Person?

Daily writing prompt
Who are your favorite artists?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Answering this question correctly depends on the definition of artist. Like many Jetpak questions, it fails to be specific. It’s almost like they have a dumb ass question generator or something. However, I like this question well enough to answer with minimal disdain. To do so, I need to provide myself a definition.

noun

  1. a person who produces paintings or drawings as a profession or hobby.
    • Similar: creator originator, designer producer, old master
    • A person who practices any of the various creative arts, such as a sculptor, novelist, poet, or filmmaker.
      • Similar: entertainer performer, trouper, showman, player,
    • a person skilled at a particular task or occupation: “a surgeon who is an artist with the scalpel.”
      • Similar: expert, master, maestro, past master, adept
    • performer, such as a singer, actor, or dancer.
    • informal
      • a habitual practitioner of a specified reprehensible activity: “a con artist” · “rip-off artist.”

As you may have guessed, I’m in a bit of a mood today, but now I have something to base my answer on. So here goes.

As a writer, my first thoughts about the creative arts are about works of literature. However, this presents an issue for me. I can rattle on for days about different works of literature and their importance without breaking a sweat. But, for the purposes of this post I will discuss some of my favorites.

Novels

  1. Ralph Ellison
  2. Gordon Weaver
  3. Stephen King

Poetry

  1. Dante Alighieri
  2. Langston Hughes
  3. Adrienne Rich

Painting and such

  1. Francisco Goya
  2. Sandro Botticelli
  3. Jean-Michel Basquiat

Photography

  1. Gordon Parks
  2. Annie Lieberwitz
  3. Vivian Maier

Comic and such

  1. Luis Royo
  2. Tim Bradstreet
  3. Al Jaffee

Here is the short list off the top of my head. Looking back over this post, I chuckle a bit because I remember my wife asking me a question after I had answered her questions. Why can’t you answer a question like a normal question?

Weekend Writing Prompt #388

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – WWP

Silence breathed whispers from the shadows, cloaked forgotten secrets slow dance. Memories and promises entwined like lovers, in madness in darkness.

REBLOG: Nguyễn Thị Phương Trâm’s

I read this piece last year and enjoyed it immensely. It asked a question that keeps me honest.

Do you need 5 people to love you or 5000 followers?

A poem in Vietnamese by Lê Vĩnh TàiTranslator: Nguyễn Thị Phương TrâmPhotography: Nguyễn Thị Phương Trâm The Strand NYC A poet was taking a …

Do you need 5 people to love you or 5000 followers?

REBLOG: 5 Big Distractions From Writing & How To Beat Them — Ben Starling


Sophia Tallon has published 5 Big Distractions From Writing and How to Beat Them, by Ben Starling at her site. “How do to defeat distractions and stay on top of targets? Some times I don’t. But I’ve found a few plans for conquering my distractions that work well for me most of the time. Perhaps […]

5 Big Distractions From Writing & How To Beat Them — Ben Starling

REBLOG: The Writer’s Path – On The Necessity of Flawed Characters

I reblogged this post last year, and it is still relevant.

On The Necessity of Flawed Characters

I’ve gotten super into podcasts in this past year (file under #latetotheparty). Why? I think I thought they were all nonfictional musings on things. …

On The Necessity of Flawed Characters

A Matter of Interpretation

When you think of the word “successful,” who’s the first person that comes to mind and why?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

“Successful” can have different meanings depending on the context, but broadly speaking, being successful refers to achieving goals or desired outcomes. Here are some ways success can be defined in different areas:

  1. Personal Success: Achieving personal goals, happiness, fulfillment, or growth. It might involve self-improvement, achieving work-life balance, or cultivating meaningful relationships.
  2. Professional Success: Accomplishing career objectives, such as gaining promotions, excelling in one’s field, building a reputable business, or making significant contributions to a profession.
  3. Financial Success: Attaining financial stability, wealth, or independence, defined by income level, savings, investments, or the ability to support a particular lifestyle.
  4. Creative Success: For artists, writers, and creators, success might involve producing meaningful work, gaining recognition, influencing others, or feeling satisfied with creative expression.
  5. Social Success: This could be defined by having strong relationships, a positive social impact, or being recognized for contributions to a community..

As an administrator, I can provide several definitions of success, as well as examples, plans, and whatever is necessary for a deeper understanding of the meaning of success. However, despite temptation, we must try not to push one’s personal definition on the others around us. I say to myself more than anyone else. As I have gotten older, I’ve learned to appreciate that measuring success is a matter of interpretation.

One Word Sunday – The Rain

CHALLENGE RESPONSE – FICTION – FIRST PERSON NARRATIVE

Here’s my response to Debbie’s One Word Sunday – Rain

The monsoon season had come, and I wasn’t ready. I was assigned to a forward position and tasked with repairing the abandoned radio station. Once I got there, all the equipment was in a foreign language. For hours, I tried to figure out how to make the equipment. Finally, I could contact my unit. I attached my handheld to the terminal and informed them of my status. They told me a soldier was arriving to assist me. I wasn’t thrilled, but I needed help. I barely put the mic down when the door flew open, and my help had arrived.

She was as soaked as I was. It would have been a miracle if there was a dry spot on her. Rain gear was no match for the monsoon. She introduced herself and put on some fancy music. We worked side by side until the darkness began to swallow the light. The radio station was up, and everything was fine. She removed her wet clothing, placing it by the vent. She motioned for me to do the same. I sat there, not sure what to do. I could see the steam rising from her clothes. She looked at me and started to undress. I have to admit there’s nothing worse than wearing wet clothes. Well, maybe wearing wet clothes in the middle of the winter, but I didn’t find that out until years later.

We stuffed newspaper in our boots and sat them by the heater. The newspaper draws moisture from the boots. We sat there, strangers, eating our rations in our underwear. After we finished eating, she walked out in the rain. This woman was insane. She stood there, her head tilted back, letting the rain wash over her. It was as if she was letting the rain wash away her demons. Watching her, I began to understand why women were so beautiful. She was the perfect blend of beauty and nature. Before then, women were beautiful; that’s just how it was. But it meant more; I can’t really explain it. They just did.

I found myself standing in the rain next to her. She turned and looked at me momentarily and then said,

Some days, I crave the rain.

Things aren’t like they used to be …

Daily writing prompt
What brands do you associate with?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

A year ago, I could name brands I use regularly without hesitation. I’ve been using them for most of my life. However, I’ve noticed recently that the brands we used to think were solid have fallen to the wayside. Increasingly, I’ve become more disappointed with the products offered by the brands I’m used to using. My brothers and I, on several occasions, went with a less expensive option instead of using the brands we’ve used most of our lives. I can point to two reasons for this shift.

First, quality and price point: It makes no sense to pay top dollar for an inferior product. In several cases, our work has a no-skimping motto.

“You can’t put a price on quality!” This is very true in some cases, but it’s becoming hollow words found in old books.

This statement rings in my head whenever I look for a replacement or an addition for the shop or the lab. As a writer, I find it necessary to replace equipment as much as some other industries. In my opinion, as long as you can open a word processor program, the keyboard works, and you have a decent laser printer, you’re golden. As a visual artist, things become complicated rather quickly.

Processing video, editing photos, or creating composition art can be done on older machines, but the necessity of a “Dammit Doll” becomes apparent. A “Dammit Doll” is a stuffed doll that comes in various forms whose purpose is to bang it against something (your choice) while screaming dammit. My Irish twin bought me one a few years back, and I might need to give her a call to get a new one. Every year, she gives me a new device to relieve my stress; perhaps she’s trying to tell me something.

The point of this is I needed to replace my external drives. I had to consider different manufacturers because the brands I have been using for decades are crap. So, I found less expensive options. They’re designed for something else but will do nicely for video, photo, and writing draft storage. With the money I saved, I was able to purchase two. I had enough left for a guilty pleasure. It’s always nice to buy a guilty pleasure from time to time.

Products aren’t made like they used to be, too, though brand loyalty has beaten into our heads. Be open-minded and select the best product to fit your needs. Here are a few things I use. Perhaps they will help.

  • Determine your need—This is the most crucial step of the process. You can’t establish a budget or begin researching products without knowing exactly what you need. It makes no sense to buy something that doesn’t fulfill your needs just because its price fits your budget. “I can get by with this,” or “This is just as good.” Yeah, I hear you. Been there several times. Here’s what I have to say about it … Cut that shit out!
  • Establish a budget—I have a budget in mind before I purchase anything. However, I can’t do this without determining my needs. By determining my needs, I know how much money I need to raise. I try to never go over my budget. However, sometimes, when you start researching a product, you find it is more expensive than you initially thought. It may change based on your needs. Be flexible.
  • Do your research – With information readily available, there is no longer an excuse for not being an informed consumer. Read the product reviews from other consumers, and be careful; there is much misinformation out there. Also, there are videos on YouTube about products that can be useful. Many manufacturers provide user manuals on their websites. You read about the product before purchasing anything.

Until next time …Peace

Reading is Fun

Daily writing prompt
What is your favorite hobby or pastime?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Reading is part of the job as a writer. However, I must admit that some of my reading has nothing to do with writing. It’s just for fun. I love discovering the magical lands within the pages, regardless of genre. There are two sides to every story.

I’m Richer than I’ve Ever Been

Daily writing prompt
What would you do if you lost all your possessions?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

This question reminds me of times when I was a youngster. I remember those horrible confrontations about stealing something; you have no idea what the other person was talking about. That special toy or prized possession has mysteriously vanished, and the only logical explanation is that you stole it. It doesn’t matter how much you profess your innocence; the injured party is convinced. Friendships are destroyed over something that may have cost less than five dollars. The battle between them is bad enough, but when the parents got involved, the issue seemed to be about something other than the vanished item.

I wish this scenario I described was limited to childhood, but sadly, it isn’t. I’ve seen longtime friends destroyed over something like this. I’ve seen people beaten over the loss of possessions. The strangest thing is that most of the time, vanished items either turn up or are taken by someone other than the accused. However, the damage has already been done. Some relationships recover, but they never were like they were before. That’s true, the actual loss… the friendship.

I’ve learned this concept through my own loss. I’ve lost all my possessions several times over the years. Some items aren’t replaceable. I can say honestly that losing some of these items was very painful. I remember a friend was Native American, he carried a leather pouch filled with pebbles. There wasn’t anything special about those pebbles that I could see. However, one day, I asked him about it. I was curious. Other friends told me to mine my own business. So, I dropped it.

At the time, I carried something from each of my children in a zip-lock bag. During the quiet moments, I would pull them out, look at them, and remember what I was fighting for; every mile I walked, every sleepless night, and the duties performed for God and Country so my family could have a better life. I believed that. It’s what held me together. I did this privately. One of those moments, my friend came and sat next to them. He was quiet for a long time. We just sat in the peace of the moment.

After a while, he pulled his pouch from his hip and began to tell me about it. He said each pebble contained a memory of an event that happened in his life. I listened with a perplexed expression. He smiled and said, “Dick Tracy”. I was holding a Dick Tracy trading card in my hand. My youngest daughter had given it to me before deployment. Then I got it.


Throughout my studies, I have learned a great deal about spirituality. I came across this passage some time ago, and it is relevant to this prompt:

Ibrahim Adham said, “Faith in God will be firmly established if three veils are cast aside:

  1. “Feeling pleasure in possessing anything;
  2. “Lamenting over the loss of anything;
  3. “Enjoying self-praise.”


al-Ghazzali

Fadiman, James. Essential Sufism (p. 173). HarperCollins. Kindle Edition.

Living up to this philosophy is very difficult. I struggle with it constantly. However, I still maintain the possessions that mean the most to me. These are the relationships I have developed over the years. Most material things can be replaced. Each person we interact with is unique, and our relationships with them are also exceptional. As I’ve said, I have had to rebuild several times. It’s hard work and not fun, but it can be done if you’re still breathing. Because life is our most important possession. The relationships you develop within that lifetime can be the difference between living and existing. Because of this, I’m richer than I’ve ever been.

Nothing Better to Do

Daily writing prompt
What skill would you like to learn?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Now that I’m retired, there is so much to do. I find myself making up shit to do. However, recently, I decided to put my free time to better use. While convalescing, I explored different ways to explore my creative outlets. Many of you probably noticed I’ve been posting AI images. I learned digital art skills. However, my education isn’t complete. I’d like to learn more about the digital world. I’ve spent years existing within it. I thought I knew how it worked, but it has changed. My grandchildren have taught me.

“Peepaw, you aren’t current with stuff.”

I’ve gone from being the in-house IT guy to the guy who tells them stories about his precious memories of them when they were young. So, I need to update my skills to figure out what they are talking about half the time. I’ve got nothing better to do.

Work Hard and Live Right

Daily writing prompt
In what ways does hard work make you feel fulfilled?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I’ve lived by a simple code not my own. Despite this truth, this code has served me well. Provided me a strength to develop my own. My parents worked hard their whole lives. Somehow, they didn’t seem to be tainted by this devotion. I’ve seen many succumb to the strain. If I’m honest, it’s easier than I’d like it to be. I’ve been choked by the tentacles of temptation from time to time.

Many of the elders, worked their whole lives to accomplish their individual goals. Each family having their own. I watched them in amazement. I wondered if they would make it. As I got older, I asked how they stayed focused and not lose hope.

“You focused on wrong thing. You can’t worry about that. All you can do is work hard and live right.”

This was code I subscribed to. The code based my entire life on. My personal code isn’t much different than the one I grew up with. The elder who taught me his code, hadn’t lived the life I have. I’ve had too make some adjustments over time. However, I always feel good if I work hard and live right.

The Whisper Journal

POETRY – JOURNAL ENTRY STYLE

April 6,

With the cleansing of spring, everyone has a sense of joy about them. Even on the gloomiest days, we listen to the perforated silence as the rain splatters against a shudder not quite fastened. That’s when you see her. For some unknown reason, you know to look. You stare in silence as the cool mist caresses your face. You remember that section of the park when the beauty and the path she walks weren’t born yet. You close your eyes, partaking in its wonder. You whisper a spell to the beauty, hoping it will last.

A lot of things

Daily writing prompt
What details of your life could you pay more attention to?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

For the past few months, I have been looking over how I handle things, and they totally screwed up. What upsets me is that they have broken for quite some time. Things that should not have broken in the first place. First, I must acknowledge that despite my best efforts, I am still just human. I used to think I was a cybernetic being, but then I went through the part-dragon phase. Alas, I’m just human. The last year’s health issues taught me that lesson tenfold.

I’ve never felt weakness like this before. It’s hard to wrap my head around it. Being in this state blows, to say the least. There were times when I wasn’t sure how things would turn out. I had to rely on the strength of my brothers as well as my own. I’m not used to this, but my people reminded me that my fight isn’t over. I will do well to pay more attention to that.

Hollow Man

POETRY – INTROSPECTION

​How long will my words echo in an empty hall?
How long will I sway to its melody alone?
How will silence swallow my cries?
How long will my essence seep from the cracks of my shattered shells? 

Oh, how I long to be deafened by the screams
How I long to be drenched in their pain
To feel the passion of the tale, so eloquently crafted
To soak the page with tears of a depicted sorrow

​I yearn for the warmth of the lover’s flame
To be memorized by its dance
To be enchanted by its unscripted ballad
The uncontrollable churn of my soul to its mythic rhythm

To feel the surge from the heartfelt turning into a pound
The sensation of my chest tightening, the pause of that breathless gasp just before the pant
The anticipation of the splash from the bead forged in the embers of the moment
The feel of slickness on my palms right as I turn the page to the next chapter of my life

To be filled with pride from your look of approval
To be filled with passion from the same eyes but a different glance
To know love to the core, standing firm in its goodness, as well as un-wavered by its pain
To understand by knowing it, I will be the better for it

For any man experiencing these and so many more…
Of that man, I am envious.
To feel any of these things, in that instant, I will cease being

The

Hollow Man

Random Thoughts – 09242024

PROSE – RANDOM THOUGHTS/REFLECTION – THE STATE OF THINGS

Hello everyone,

You may have noticed that things here at the Memoirs of Madness have been a little spotty. I apologize for that; I really do. It’s been a rough year for me health-wise, and though I’m much better, I’ve been dealing with the emotional side of things. I’ve been wondering how the hell I made it through all this and other questions that arise when dealing with health issues as one ages.

So, in the next few weeks, I will be making some changes to the blog. More precisely, I will focus on cleaning up dead links, adding new pages, removing old pages, and such. This is an attempt to improve the blog’s UI/UX. I will announce the changes as they happen; please let me know if I muck something up. Any suggestions are welcome. Until next time … wish me luck.

That was a close one…

Daily writing prompt
Write about your most epic baking or cooking fail.

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Once upon a time, in a country other than my own, a few of us decided we were going to cook an American Thanksgiving dinner. There were six of us, four men and two women. I must admit the women tried to talk us out of this idea of ours but weren’t hearing any of that nonsense. All six of us were experts in several fields. How hard could preparing a meal be? The women quickly declared they wouldn’t have anything to do with the pending disaster. Intelligent women, I always liked them.

We started cooking a few days before Thanksgiving, and things seemed to be going well. We knocked out almost all the side dishes and started on the desserts. However, a few things occurred that started to make me nervous. We had begun improvising when we ran out of spices and stuff. However, we forged forward. In the back of my mind, I secretly hoped our female counterparts would ride in and save the day. However, they were a no-show.

The meal was complete, and the phone calls were made for people to join us. No one showed. I know this seems sad but this was, actually a good thing. The food was horrible. We were just about order pizzas when the doorbell rang. Our female counterparts had made dinner for us. That was a close one.

My Happy Place

Daily writing prompt
How do you relax?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I’m not sure if I know what the word really means. I know the definition and how it’s used, but I haven’t been able to relax for most of my life. I’ve always had a vivid imagination, so I tend to retreat inside my mind when I need to take a break. However, you can probably see the problem with this technique. As a writer, I think of various scenes in my mind. I can tell you many of them aren’t rather relaxing. I discussed the concept of relaxation with my editor, and she laughed. When she regained her composure, she provided me some advice. She talked about the avenues of my creative expression and how I should not create content for my blog, portfolio, or anything else I’m into. So, I thought about the places that make me happy.

Here’s what I came up with:

I’ve always found gardening really relaxing, so I can imagine my idea of relaxation involving some sort of garden. I’d have to keep my brain out of it, though. I can see myself trying to figure out the soil composition to plan which flowers grew best in my region.


I’ve also felt at home in the mountains.


However, the activity requiring the least amount of preparation is reading.

Within the pages of a book, I imagine different lands, worlds, and periods of time. After which, a nap is appropriate.

Ear Infections suck!

Daily writing prompt
What are you doing this evening?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I don’t remember ever having an ear infection when I was young. I’ve dealt with them in regard to the children and grandchildren. Imagine my surprise when my doctor told me I had infections in both ears. Of course, I looked at her as if she had lost her mind, but she held her ground, and I walked out of the office, pouting a little. You see, I’m supposed to be at a concert at this very moment, but no, I’m at home dealing with this imaginary spike in both my ears. I say imaginary because when I look into the mirror, I don’t see anything. So, excuse me while I spray stuff in my nose and take my other meds. Ear infections suck!

Do I have to?

Daily writing prompt
If you had to give up one word that you use regularly, what would it be?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I’m secure with my current lexicon. Typically, I don’t use any word or phrase more than necessary. However, people may find several phrases or words a bit abrasive. I keep that in mind when I talk to them. Now, I promised my late Madre that I would be a good boy, but there are times when I slip up. So, I’m not comfortable removing any words or phrases from rotation.

I suppose I could come up with a proper list, but do I have to?

Pecan Pie and Big F**king Animals

Daily writing prompt
Share a story about the furthest you’ve ever traveled from home.

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

This story isn’t about the furthest I’ve been from home but about a story that rocked my idea of how the world worked. Being raised in the Midwest, wildlife consisted of deer and such—everything we read about in books or saw on television. As I got older, I ran into wolves, bears, and mountain lions. How cool is that? It was pretty cool as a kid who grew up around asphalt and concrete.

One of my road trips involved driving a semi through the Northwest, Wyoming, and Montana. I had never seen such open space and beauty combined. It was absolutely breathtaking. There was good food, pleasant people, and fresh air. The silence was disturbing at first. I adjusted and enjoyed the drive. I caught a glance of my passenger window to see wild horses running. It freaked me out. I might even been a little giddy.

I spent some time in Montana, during which I had an opportunity to drive through Lulu Pass, Montana. The winding road made the drive challenging. I noticed an animal in the road, and I honked at it so it would clear the road. However, no one had told me that the air horn could piss off the wildlife. I didn’t find that out until later. So, I was on the road watching an enormous animal walk toward my truck. I was driving a cab over, so I sat higher than a typical semi. As the animal got closer, it looked like a moose, but later, I was told it was probably a Yak or Caribou or something.

The damn was tall enough to look into the cab of my truck. This animal stopped and looked directly at me. I’ve seen some hairy things in my day, but this unnerved me a bit. So, I sat there until the animal decided to move along. I waited for this moment for about an hour. Later, I was eating at a local diner and told the story; the locals told me I was lucky I didn’t get rammed and gave me a piece of pecan pie.

Boob Tube: Chronicles of a Misspent Youth

Daily writing prompt
What TV shows did you watch as a kid?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Lately, I’ve gotten into the habit of overthinking each of the challenges I usually participate in here on WordPress. So, when I read this challenge, I decided to explore all the television programs I could remember from my youth. I used AI to assist with this project, and of course, AI started repeating television shows. So, I had to rely on my memory. So, here are the television shows I can remember watching as a kid. This list only includes only the television shows that I enjoyed.

1. All in the Family (1971–1979)

2. M*A*S*H (1972–1983)

3. Hawaii Five-O (1968–1980)

4. Happy Days (1974–1984)

5. Laverne & Shirley (1976–1983)

6. The White Shadow (1978–1981)

7. Sanford and Son (1972–1977)

8. The Streets of San Francisco (1972–1977)

9. Charlie’s Angels (1976–1981)

10. The Love Boat (1977–1987)

11. The Six Million Dollar Man (1974–1978)

12. The Bionic Woman (1976–1978)

13. Columbo (1971–2003)

14. The Jeffersons (1975–1985)

15. Good Times (1974–1979)

16. Kojak (1973–1978)

17. Starsky & Hutch (1975–1979)

18. Wonder Woman (1975–1979)

19. Taxi (1978–1983)

20. What’s Happening!! (1976 – 1979)

21. WKRP in Cincinnati (1978–1982)

22. Welcome Back, Kotter (1975–1979)

23. Fantasy Island (1977–1984)

24. Barnaby Jones (1973–1980)

25. Three’s Company (1977 – 1984)

26. Barney Miller (1975–1982)

27. The Rockford Files (1974–1980)

28. Chico and the Man (1974–1978)

29. Get Smart (1965–1970)

30. Soap (1977–1981)

31. Quincy, M.E. (1976–1983)

32. The Mod Squad (1968–1973)

33. McMillan & Wife (1971–1977)

34. Bonanza (1959–1973)

35. The Beverly Hillbillies (1962–1971)

36. The Night Stalker (1974–1975)

37. Maude (1972–1978)

38. Police Woman (1974–1978)

39. One Day at a Time (1975–1984)

40. Room 222 (1969–1974)

41. Ironside (1967–1975)

42. Mission: Impossible (1966–1973)

43. Gunsmoke (1955–1975)

44. S.W.A.T. (1975–1976)

45. Rhoda (1974–1978)

46. Baretta (1975–1978)

47. The Paper Chase (1978–1979)

48. Rawhide (1959 – 1965)

49. Magnum P.I. (1980 – 1988)

50. Airwolf (1984 – 1987)

I only listed 50 shows; I figured that was enough. I actually got close to nearly 75 shows. I think this is as much a memory exercise as anything else. It was fun reminiscing about my youth. One thing that occurred to me was that I watched too much television.

Amused

Daily writing prompt
How are you feeling right now?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Today, I got a wild hair up my buttocks and decided to reorganize my office. I didn’t want to reorganize; I needed to relabel all my containers and plastic bins. Plastic bins are evil, just in case you didn’t know. Putting something in a large bin to store somewhere is probably a good sign that you don’t need it. However, we need to have a bunch of stuff we don’t need. I’m sure some therapists would have some fancy word for this behavior. I’m sure they could tell you exactly what it is, right after they find their notes tucked away in one of those bins from medical school.

As I continue to clean up my office and get things in order, I discover I’m making more of a mess. So, I sit here amused as I write this post. I’m a little worn out as well, but as look around and it looks like I haven’t done a damn thing. I’m just amused with myself.

Retirement is Sweet

Daily writing prompt
What daily habit do you do that improves your quality of life?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Since I retired, I’ve been trying to figure out what I’m doing with myself most days. However, I have developed a few new habits. For some reason, I suddenly felt it was important to do self-care. When I was a young man, you were supposed to be based on the principle of good single malt and bad decisions. However, I try to eat better and enjoy the things I didn’t do when I was young.

Recently, I returned to creating art. I figured that part of my life was over since I hadn’t explored it in decades. So, every day, I brew a pot of coffee and start working on creating something. It doesn’t matter to me which avenue I decide to explore. Lately, I have been sketching out ideas for the creations I’m trying to render. Frequently, I start with character development and work on their backstories. I work until I get worn out and then nap. Napping is a new daily habit.

At the end of the day, I feel good if I have created something.

It’s Just Something about it

Daily writing prompt
What’s your favorite time of day?

DAILY CHALLENGE RESPONSE

I’ve always enjoyed the part of the day when it seems the world is still asleep. Nothing is stirring; it is just quiet. Today, silence is a commodity. We need to have something going all the time. We can’t seem to be still. I’m no better; I have something going on all the time. Yet, sometimes, right before dawn, I sit outside and listen to the soundscape. The crickets chirping. The rustle of the grass as a stray cat moves to its next hiding place. I feel them watching me. It’s okay because watching them. Sometimes, they come to visit. They lay on the porch, taking in the morning.

I was raised in the city, so I didn’t understand what it meant to be still. I’ve spent time in the desert and the woods. I know there are things that go bump in the night. They’re protecting themselves from our clumsiness, our rudeness, our carelessness, and our obliviousness. They have so much to say without uttering a word. I wonder what it would be like if we were just silent?


Wouldn’t you like to Know?

Daily writing prompt
Where did your name come from?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I looked up my name once; you know, our obsession with googling ourselves. Perhaps we find the things we have forgotten about to be nifty. More likely, we find things that we wish we could forget about. You know, like a video of a drunken you dancing ungracefully to Rod Stewart’s Do Ya Think I’m Sexy or perhaps a blog post about a soulful rendition, though sung off-key, and is remarkably similar to an experience you’ve done. Yes, the names are withheld, but there couldn’t be two jackasses commenting the same during the period.

As far as the origin of my name, I don’t have a clue. I suppose I could spin a yarn about a maiden by a brook reading a book while a doe gently drank from the brook or something. Yeah, I got nothing …

At the Movies … Mangus Edition

Daily writing prompt
What are your top ten favorite movies?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

I’ve watched thousands of hours of video content throughout my lifetime, so it would be difficult to compile a list of my favorite movies. If I’m honest, the list changes from time to time. I get into moods where I watch a particular genre until I run out of movies. So, I will list a few movies that stand out.

The first five films on my list feature the legend of Sidney Poitier, and I’m a definite fan of the legend. My personal favorite is The Simple Life of Noah Dearborn. It wasn’t one of his many masterpieces, but its message is refreshing.

  • Blackboard Jungle (1955)
  • Defiant Ones (1958)
  • In the Heat of the Night (1967)
  • Piece of the Action (1977)
  • Simple Life of Noah Dearborn (1999)

These next five aren’t in any order, but I enjoy them each time I watch them. I don’t have a particular reason; I just like them.

  • Bait (2012)
  • The Conversation (1973)
  • King Arthur (2004)
  • The Shawshank Redemption (1994)
  • The Green Mile (1999)

These are some of the films that come to mind immediately. I’m sure if I thought about them a little longer, I could come up with a proper list and reasons for each film.

Here are some honorable mentions:

  • Cool Hand Luke (1967)
  • The Jacket (2005)
  • Silverado (1985)
  • The Natural (1984)
  • The Way of the Gun (2000)

Well, here is my list. Perhaps you have seen some of these and enjoyed them. There are maybe some you want to check out.

Stay Tuned …

Daily writing prompt
Describe your life in an alternate universe.

DAILY CHALLENGE RESPONSE

This prompt is too rich to answer with a quick response. As fiction writer, this prompt opens the possibility of all kinds of nifty stuff. I have to make a decision whether or not to make life better or worse. Perhaps, I could make myself charming with a wonderful sense of humor. Perhaps, I could be dashing or something. Whichever way … STAY TUNED

I’m Married the Woman who lived the house with the pretty flowers.

How would you improve your community?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

All I knew about flowers was that you gave them to a girl you were sweet on. So, when I met my future wife, I had much to learn. Now, I had no idea that I was going to marry her at the time, but strangest things, right? I spent a great deal of time in her flower garden while we were dating. I don’t know the names of flowers, but I know how deep to plant them or whether they grow in the sun or the shade. As well as how much to water them. You may be wondering what this story has to do with improving my community. Let me explain.

Throughout our marriage, my wife and I planted numerous gardens, indoor and outdoor. The indoor gardens were a challenge, but we pulled it off. Our last garden was our biggest and most challenging garden. In this garden, we planted both vegetables and flowers. Typically, we did either one or the other. However, that’s not what made this garden special. What made this garden stand out was its effect on the neighborhood.

We lived in the shady part of town and there all kinds of madness going on 24 hours a day. The people were decent enough, but no one seemed to care about anything outside their world. We were no different. It was about surviving our circumstances best way we could. My wife’s had begun to progress and one day she said she wanted a garden. I looked at her like she had finally lost her mind. There really wasn’t any place to put the garden she described. She didn’t let it go

Our backyard was nearly completely asphalt, so one morning I stood out there looking at it wondering how we were going to pull this off. I grabbed my pickaxe and went to work. It took me a week to clear the area by hand. It didn’t occur to me to rent a tiller. I just swinging that pickaxe. I tilled the soul with a rack then planted a flower right in the middle of the clearing. I went inside and took a nap in my chair. My wife woke me up and took me to the back and it started.

Over the next few weeks, I had the whole filled with flowers. Here is the interesting part, we went around town and asked people if we could get piece of their flowers. I was surprised when nearly everyone said yes. We did this every year for three years. There were a few ladies who would set aside seedlings for my wife. Others called her when they got something new. I shook my head at this, but would get into the truck and pick stuff up. My wife even nurseries on her rolodex. They’d call each year and donate a plant or two.

One night, one of my dogs alerted me to activity outside. I noticed that a few of the neighborhood yahoos were sitting in the garden. Immediately, I was ready to kick off the property. However, something strange happened. Some trash had blown in the garden, and I watched them get up and clear it up. They kept our garden free of trash. My wife passed and I moved, but for three years they maintained the garden. I received phone calls from my wife’s flower network wondering if I was going to keep things going. I declined and they understood.

Sometimes the littlest things mean so much. I guess that’s what happens when you marry the woman in the house with the pretty flowers.

Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy

Daily writing prompt
What positive emotion do you feel most often?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Most days, I’m content and peaceful, neither positive or negative. However, this prompt maybe think of this skit.

Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner

Daily writing prompt
If you could host a dinner and anyone you invite was sure to come, who would you invite?

DAILY CHALLENGE RESPONSE

I don’t do dinner parties, so the prompt doesn’t apply. However, I’ll play along for the sake of something. I’m unsure what, but I’ll play anyway.

If, I do mean if I were to consider hosting a dinner party, it would have to be for some special people. So, since we are in fantasy land, I would invite some of my favorite authors. The guest list is featured below.


So, the guest list are some of my favorite authors. You probably have noticed that all of them are deceased except for one. They said they wanted a guest list. Nobody said I had to play fair

It’s Not what you think?

Daily writing prompt
What is your favorite genre of music?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

Most people I meet think my favorite genre of music is rock and roll. Based on the music I play on this blog, those reading this may be inclined to agree with that assessment. The truth is there is entirely too much music out there to be narrowed down or pigeonholed.

However, there are a few genres in which I have a soft spot: jazz, Blues, and old-school R&B. These are the music I grew up listening to. My first concert was a jazz concert. My Madre dragged me to see George Benson. I can’t remember the show, but I’ve spent my life listening to his music. The jazz record I remember listening to was Ramsey Lewis’s Sun Goddess. I didn’t know it was jazz, but I still loved it.

Madre also played Motown, the Philly sound, and other R&B artists, such as Billy Paul, Barry White, and Teddy Pendergrass. My Mother also introduced me to rock and roll. She played Doobie Brothers, Steely Dan, Linda Ronstadt, and others. So, it would seem that I was destined to be eclectic with my music choices.


Ice Cream Sandwiches

Daily writing prompt
What’s your go-to comfort food?

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

There are many types of food that provide me comfort, but there is nothing like a good ole fashioned ice cream sandwich. That’s all I got to say about that.

Clear as the Morning

Daily writing prompt
Write about a random act of kindness you’ve done for someone.

DAILY PROMPT RESPONSE

When I was young, I was taught about altruism. I watched my MiMi practice this principle consistently. So, discussing random acts of kindness I’ve done is against my code. However, I can’t deny the power of random acts of kindness. They can shape one’s day or have lasting effects throughout an entire lifetime. I will discuss a few ideas I have watched emerge over the years that complement my code.

In 2000, a film called Pay It Forward was released. It was a delightful little film that I enjoyed immensely. In short, the film discusses the principle that if someone does you a kindness, you pay that kindness forward to another person. I still hear people uttering the Pay It Forward mantra. I love it. What I love about it is the fact nothing is expected in return. This makes the act altruistic in nature.

While dealing with my late wife’s health issues, I ran into a family who believed in a concept called God Winks. I had never heard of this concept and immediately dismissed it as hokum. Yet, one of the elders of the family sat down and explained the idea to me. Then, I realized it wasn’t hokum. We all have experienced seemingly unexplained acts of kindness throughout our lives, and this family called them God Winks. I still smile when I remember that conversation.

Lastly, in my studies, I came across a gentleman named Alan Watts. He had a concept I found rather refreshing that fit my code. This concept was called Clear as the Morning. Basically, the concept goes like this: When you wake up in the morning, envision your ideal morning, and whatever happens that day will be easier to handle. I have used this principle since I discovered it.