Personal Reflection:
Regret has a peculiar way of lingering — not loud, but constant, like background static. You can’t touch it, but it hums underneath the day. Auster’s words cut close: We are haunted by the lives we don’t lead. The choices we didn’t make, the versions of ourselves we left hanging in the doorway. We tell ourselves we’re fine with how things turned out, but every now and then, something stirs — a half-remembered song, a familiar street, a name we don’t say out loud — and we feel the ghost move again.
We don’t like to admit it, but we build entire lives out of what we didn’t choose. Every decision erases a hundred possibilities, and those absences don’t disappear — they follow quietly behind us, a shadow of what might have been. Maybe that’s what nostalgia really is — the ache of parallel versions of ourselves still trying to be born.
I think about the person I might’ve become if I’d stayed, if I’d gone, if I’d said yes instead of no. But every alternate life has its own price tag. Even the ones that look golden from this side of the glass would’ve demanded a different loss. Maybe the haunting isn’t punishment — maybe it’s memory’s way of reminding us that every path costs something.
And sometimes, the hardest ghosts to face aren’t the lives we never lived — they’re the parts of ourselves we abandoned along the way. The ones we outgrew too fast. The ones we silenced for approval. The ones we dismissed as weakness when they were just unguarded.
We are all haunted, but maybe haunting isn’t a curse — maybe it’s a form of tenderness. Proof that we’ve imagined more than we could live. Proof that somewhere inside us still believes in what’s possible. The trick is not to banish those ghosts, but to listen to what they’re trying to say: that life is not a single straight line, but a chorus of unfinished songs.
You don’t have to live every life to be whole. You just have to make peace with the ones that never happened — to thank them for showing you who you could have been, and then keep walking toward who you still might become.
Reflective Prompt:
What unlived version of yourself still lingers at the edges — and what might happen if you stopped mourning them and started listening to what they’re trying to tell you?
Memoirs of Madness 